Aug 25, 2007

speak up, i can't see you.

y'know, the Rolling Stones really were visionaries when they said 'what a drag it is getting old.'

visionaries, i tells ya..

not that i want any of 'Mother's Little Helper,' although after today...

as you know, i'm not single. i'm not even bi.

however, i am tri.

as in trifocals.

tri-fo-cals.

dude. that soooooooooooooo sucks. in three ways from Sunday.

sorry. it had to be said.

i knew i was buying time, really. it's been harder and harder to read small print on things @ work.

but holy crap, kids. trifocals?! nothing like that to remind me that i ain't a kid.

dammit - my stepfather is 81. he doesn't have bifocals, much less trifocals. my mom is 66 and she doesn't have 'em, either.

must be from dad. thanks, dad. first you left AND you left me with your crappy eyesight.

what the heck. i gotta blame someone.

AND since we were at Costco (where, as you know, you can get EVERYTHING, even a casket), my husband, dear sweet kind Brendan, said perhaps we could look for a walker for me.

niiiice.

heck, even my mother jumped on the dumpbandwagon and said the SPCA would probably have a good place to find a seeing-eye dog.

ah, the love of family.

trifocals. dude. that's SO wrong. and do you think it would be easy finding a pair of glasses i could use for tris? oh heck no. every cute pair i picked up didn't have large enough lenses.
oh. sorry. i guess i'll get these big ass bug eye glasses in orange. especially since i look soooo good in orange.

but thankfully, for my vanity's sake, i did find a pair of cute dark rose metal frames. not as cute as the green & black ones i really wanted, but the lens wasn't big enough (insert sarcastic, smart-ass tone here).

so let's see. i now have trifocals. i have arthritis, AND i started taking meds for acid reflux.

what a drag it is getting old.
hey. maybe i DO want some of Mother's Little Helper. i'd still have the same problems, but crap - i just wouldn't care.

think i can get that @ Costco?

7 comments:

chlorinejenny said...

Come up here to visit and get laser eye surgery done. I had it done in January and I haven't regretted it. I still catch myself pushing up my imaginary glasses sometimes though!

...after surgery--which takes 15 minutes--they give you great "mother's little helper" pills!

Hillary said...

oh you poor thing. . .why doncha grab a shawl and take a little nap?? LOL. . .remember some things improve with age. . .cheese, wine. . .us!

Hillary

skrpndiva said...

I had the surgery too. Of course, that surgery doesn't help the reading part, so I'm not looking forward to that coming. Of course, according to my eye doctor, by the time I'll have reading issues, they'll have a surgery for that too!

I'm so vain.

Jax

doodlebugmom said...

I was thinking the other day I should get my eyes checked, its been a couple years. Now I am thinking I will avoid it a little longer!

:o)

Jolene George said...

Getting old does suck. We fall apart little by little. SO sorry about the trifocals. You will share a picture, right?!

Valerie said...

i can do that. the glasses weren't my first choice (i really, REALLY liked the black/green combo) but at least they weren't the total granny glasses. oy.

Becky said...

Yes, getting old sucks. As much as I love my eye doctor, I cringe every time he tells me I have my mother's eyes. She's currently 64 and has been wearing trifocals for roughly 15 years. As well as the other 3 or so pair of glasses she has. I used to joke her about having a pair of glasses to eat, to brush her hair, feed the cats, etc. But now it's not so funny because slowly but surely, my eyes are getting as bad as hers. I've got only 2 sets of glasses so far, but 40 is rapidly approaching and I've a feeling once I get there, I'll be joining the trifocal brigade.

But at least I know I'll be in good company.

:-)