December 2014. Life changed.
It seemed like a normal day at work, or at least it started that way.
Then we were all called down into a meeting room. And after 27 years at the same place, i found out that our office was being closed. Work being sent to off shore or Florida. Opportunities to work in Florida, if you're interested.
So what to do? i have elderly parents. i didn't feel comfortable leaving them. So i opted to stay.
Not long after that, my stepfather collapsed at home. The hospital couldn't find anything really wrong, and just decided he needed some PT. So off he was sent to a local convalescent home for PT and then was sent home.
March 2015. Life changed. Again.
Stepfather collapsed again at home Back to the hospital. More PT. Back to the convalescent home.
Things really changed, then. He wasn't eating. Wasn't interested in PT. The doctor said they were sending him home for hospice care.
He was dying.
Nothing really wrong, right?
He came home on a Sunday. He was gone by Wednesday.
2015 - i lost a family member. i lost my identity as a working woman. i totally lost my way.
i'm still lost in a way. The holidays sucked - as they always do when there's loss of a family member.
i like the fact that even though i'm unemployed still, i've been able to care for my mom in many more ways. Making her life a little easier.
November 2015. Life changed. Again, again.
Husband was coming home from work on the freeway, when they came to a complete stop. Unfortunately, the man behind him, didn't stop. Rammed the beejeebers out of the car my husband was in.
It's just a car. The husband is fine. It's just a thing, right?
He was a temporary employee at his work. I have no job. We're down to one car.
Now i know there are many out there that are FAR worse off then i. But when these many things hit you all at once, well, it can make you wonder what's going on.
But on the plus side:
* Husband got hired on permanently at his work.
* My mom has graciously lent me her car, so the Husband can use my car to get back and forth to work.
* Donny Osmond is alive and well and in concert this Saturday. I.am.going.
It's hard, this life. i truly don't know how anyone that doesn't have a spiritual basis can go on. There's been many a time in the last months i've sat here, tears coursing down my face, wondering how i can go on. How can God have his hand in this. How can it be all right when it all seems to be falling apart.
i guess that's why it's called faith.
Showing posts with label forest vs. trees. Show all posts
Showing posts with label forest vs. trees. Show all posts
Jan 17, 2011
happy new year.
2011.
seriously?
new year. new beginning. time to start a new life.
(the Husband laid that on me when he proposed waaaaaay back in 96)
i feel like i spend a lot of time whining. wishing for more. wishing for it to be better and sometimes (OK, a lot of times) not seeing the Big Picture. that things aren't as bad as i perceive. that there IS sunshine behind the clouds.
or that the clouds aren't really there.
2010 sucked.
we lost our cat, after 14 years of purrs and pissiness.
the Husband's kick-ass Solara got rear-ended. and totalled.
the Husband had countless interviews. the majority of which went nowhere. therefore, he ended 2010 the way he began: unemployed.
on the other hand...
new furbabies entered our lives: Abby & Fletcher, belonging to friends of friends, had to get rid of them due to their kids' allergies. these two are ying and yang. they fight, they play, they love on us and the feeling is mutual. they have healed our hearts and are filling the void in our hearts left by Elvis da Wunderkat.
insurance paid off what we owed on the car. with enough left over to buy two new-to-us cars - my sister in law's Avalon and his friend's neighbor's Honda.
two cars and no payments. righteous.
doors closed. windows opened. God's hand in it all.
i just needed to look at it.
and a reminder...from my faux commencement speech last year:
1) You will make crappy decisions in your life. Guess what - that's just the way it goes. Like the song says, every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. Some of the choices you make will rock the world. Others, not so much. Just try to remember to learn from all and glean something out of the experience.
And while we're talking about bad decisions....
2) You will fail at something. What - this isn't the happy feel-good commencement address you were expecting? Wait....
You, you, you and even you waaaaaay in the back, will fail at something. Some will fail miserably while others will fail spectacularly. As the Husband will frequently say - 'you're gonna step on your dick'
Colorful, no?
Here's the good news: despite what the media in all forms will tell you - failure IS an option and is not always bad. After all, a chemist at DuPont failed in an experiment he was working on and ended up creating Teflon. Failure is good - learn from it and move on.
3) Love what you do. Some wag once said if you love what you do, you will never work a day in your life. Those people also have money up the wazoo. It's very likely you will have to work, and you ain't gonna love it. But find a passion. Find something that makes you happy and excited to get up in the morning. Photography, writing, gardening - whatever trips your trigger - if you find your passion and aren't lucky enough to make it your life's work, you can still be lucky enough to do it...and to share with others.
4) Happiness is not a birthright - it is a daily choice. If you ain't happy, guess what - it ain't your parents fault, not your siblings, your friends or even your dog's fault. That blame, my friends, lands squarely on your shoulders.
Every day we make choices, remember? You can choose happiness, too, even if your situation sucks. You don't have to be happy with the situation, just know that optimism goes a loooooong way in this world - you will live longer and not only that, you will be a thorn in the side of the nay-sayers who will lose their minds wondering what you're on because you're so damn happy all the time.
I'm not saying you should go around with a maniacal smile all the time, plucking daisies like some Ophelia, but choose your attitude daily. Choose to be optimistic. Choose to be proof positive that smiling people are up to something.
There you have it. Four little nuggets and only four because I'm somewhat OCD and I like things bookended. Go out there. Fail. Step on it...and in it. It's the only way you'll really learn, and besides, the adventure is so much more exciting living it than reading about it.
hey...2010 wasn't all that bad.
bring it, 2011. i'm so ready for you.
seriously?
new year. new beginning. time to start a new life.
(the Husband laid that on me when he proposed waaaaaay back in 96)
i feel like i spend a lot of time whining. wishing for more. wishing for it to be better and sometimes (OK, a lot of times) not seeing the Big Picture. that things aren't as bad as i perceive. that there IS sunshine behind the clouds.
or that the clouds aren't really there.
2010 sucked.
we lost our cat, after 14 years of purrs and pissiness.
the Husband's kick-ass Solara got rear-ended. and totalled.
the Husband had countless interviews. the majority of which went nowhere. therefore, he ended 2010 the way he began: unemployed.
on the other hand...
new furbabies entered our lives: Abby & Fletcher, belonging to friends of friends, had to get rid of them due to their kids' allergies. these two are ying and yang. they fight, they play, they love on us and the feeling is mutual. they have healed our hearts and are filling the void in our hearts left by Elvis da Wunderkat.
insurance paid off what we owed on the car. with enough left over to buy two new-to-us cars - my sister in law's Avalon and his friend's neighbor's Honda.
two cars and no payments. righteous.
doors closed. windows opened. God's hand in it all.
i just needed to look at it.
and a reminder...from my faux commencement speech last year:
1) You will make crappy decisions in your life. Guess what - that's just the way it goes. Like the song says, every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. Some of the choices you make will rock the world. Others, not so much. Just try to remember to learn from all and glean something out of the experience.
And while we're talking about bad decisions....
2) You will fail at something. What - this isn't the happy feel-good commencement address you were expecting? Wait....
You, you, you and even you waaaaaay in the back, will fail at something. Some will fail miserably while others will fail spectacularly. As the Husband will frequently say - 'you're gonna step on your dick'
Colorful, no?
Here's the good news: despite what the media in all forms will tell you - failure IS an option and is not always bad. After all, a chemist at DuPont failed in an experiment he was working on and ended up creating Teflon. Failure is good - learn from it and move on.
3) Love what you do. Some wag once said if you love what you do, you will never work a day in your life. Those people also have money up the wazoo. It's very likely you will have to work, and you ain't gonna love it. But find a passion. Find something that makes you happy and excited to get up in the morning. Photography, writing, gardening - whatever trips your trigger - if you find your passion and aren't lucky enough to make it your life's work, you can still be lucky enough to do it...and to share with others.
4) Happiness is not a birthright - it is a daily choice. If you ain't happy, guess what - it ain't your parents fault, not your siblings, your friends or even your dog's fault. That blame, my friends, lands squarely on your shoulders.
Every day we make choices, remember? You can choose happiness, too, even if your situation sucks. You don't have to be happy with the situation, just know that optimism goes a loooooong way in this world - you will live longer and not only that, you will be a thorn in the side of the nay-sayers who will lose their minds wondering what you're on because you're so damn happy all the time.
I'm not saying you should go around with a maniacal smile all the time, plucking daisies like some Ophelia, but choose your attitude daily. Choose to be optimistic. Choose to be proof positive that smiling people are up to something.
There you have it. Four little nuggets and only four because I'm somewhat OCD and I like things bookended. Go out there. Fail. Step on it...and in it. It's the only way you'll really learn, and besides, the adventure is so much more exciting living it than reading about it.
hey...2010 wasn't all that bad.
bring it, 2011. i'm so ready for you.
Dec 14, 2008
a legend in my own mind.
one of the advantages of self confidence is just that: you believe in yourself. you have confidence. the belief that, in most things, you can do anything.
of course, the disadvantage of self confidence IS that you believe in yourself and that you can do anything.
and heaven knows, that ain't always right.
for example:
i can cook. i've always cooked, ever since i was a kid i was making messes in the kitchen. i took cooking classes in college. my lasagna is in high demand, not only in my family, but with some of my friends.
therefore, i become a legend in cookery. no one else in the world can cook as well as i.
until i find several people that not only cook well, they cook MUCH better than i do. then i'm depressed.
stupid, huh?
ego is an amazing thing. without some of it, you can become road kill in the emotional highway of life. with it, you run the risk of becoming Tom Cruise. not necessarily jumping on Oprah's couch, but starting to believe your poo doesn't reek.
for example, in case you didn't notice, i take pictures. some are OK. some are killer and a lot of 'em are crap.
don't argue. i know they're crap. i've seen em, remember?
but - give me a new, bad-ass camera and some lucky shots and suddenly i think i'm freakin' Ansel Adams.
so not the case. but i get lucky sometimes, which is what i think happens with all of us. you write a best seller, you got lucky. you cook dinner without burning it and everyone loves it, you got lucky.
skill+ability+karma=lucky shot.
but again, give me a cool camera, and suddenly i think i can do no wrong. which i can, and often do, but i still get lucky.
and i've got to remember that luck doesn't always equal talent. but enough of talent and luck can make me a legend. if only in my dreams.
peace out.
of course, the disadvantage of self confidence IS that you believe in yourself and that you can do anything.
and heaven knows, that ain't always right.
for example:
i can cook. i've always cooked, ever since i was a kid i was making messes in the kitchen. i took cooking classes in college. my lasagna is in high demand, not only in my family, but with some of my friends.
therefore, i become a legend in cookery. no one else in the world can cook as well as i.
until i find several people that not only cook well, they cook MUCH better than i do. then i'm depressed.
stupid, huh?
ego is an amazing thing. without some of it, you can become road kill in the emotional highway of life. with it, you run the risk of becoming Tom Cruise. not necessarily jumping on Oprah's couch, but starting to believe your poo doesn't reek.
for example, in case you didn't notice, i take pictures. some are OK. some are killer and a lot of 'em are crap.
don't argue. i know they're crap. i've seen em, remember?
but - give me a new, bad-ass camera and some lucky shots and suddenly i think i'm freakin' Ansel Adams.
so not the case. but i get lucky sometimes, which is what i think happens with all of us. you write a best seller, you got lucky. you cook dinner without burning it and everyone loves it, you got lucky.
skill+ability+karma=lucky shot.
but again, give me a cool camera, and suddenly i think i can do no wrong. which i can, and often do, but i still get lucky.
and i've got to remember that luck doesn't always equal talent. but enough of talent and luck can make me a legend. if only in my dreams.
peace out.
Nov 14, 2008
s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-smokin.
so not in a good way.
once again, the state is burning.
we've got another fire that started last night in Montecito, an unincorporated area of Santa Barbara, a very nice, veddy rich, town about 100 miles north of us.
i didn't know this, but apparently some celebrities live up in Montecito. Oprah has a home up there. so does Rob Lowe. the news this morning is all fire, all the time - and showing a 10,000 mansion going up in smoke and flame.
while i feel sorry for anyone that loses their home because of fire, earthquake or whatever, i can't feel quite as sorry for someone with more money than should be allowed. they can rebuild and easily.
but, i do forget sometimes - life here in Mostly Smoggy So. Cal. isn't, well...always real. as the home of the movie business, we specialize in make believe.
and sometimes, all that money makes you forget that there is a real world out there, with real people and real pain.
in other news...
there's a pretty good possibility that the Husband could end the year without a permanent job. although, the Big Boss at my work is trying to get him on as a contractor.
will he be bored? probably. we do have a lot of contractors, doing proofreading and other paper-pushing jobs.
but heck, if it pays more than unemployment, then guess what? he's taking it. this year has sucked big sucky-sucks, and i'm ready for '09 and a new start - not only for us, but for the Country as a whole.
(which also makes me laugh, watching the news and they say that "Barack Obama won the election" - heck, kids - he won the election alright, but man - it ain't no prize. good luck, man!)
back to sports -
Tuesday was my last photo class. he talked about the intermediate class (that i believe i'm taking) and what to expect from it. he also talked about the two photo field trips - BIG photo field trips - one in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho and the other in northern California.
man. that would be sweet. i came home and told the Husband to hurry up and get a job so i could go.
because again, it's my world. y'all just live in it.
then we had show & tell.
probably about 10 or so of us brought photos on discs or thumbdrives. while most everyone brought photos of our two field trips in Norco & Balboa, they also included vacation photos & portraits they had shot.
silly me, i thought it was only for field trip shots. daaaang. i could've brought a TON of stuff and made 'em all sit through them, too.
kinda like going to someones home and getting stuck watching vacation video.
one older gentleman brought his pictures, not of either Norco or Balboa, but of his trip last year to Idaho. i can't remember exactly where, but there's a big falls out there and next to it is a walkway so you can walk down the waterfall to the end.
his pictures were of every step down that walkway.
OK. we get it. it's BIG. take your favorites and share. not the whole walk down.
snipe. snipe. snipe.
some of the photos that were shared were amazing. and in a good way. made me wonder what the heck they were doing there. and while most all of us shared too dang many photos of the Pavilion (myself included) i did get some good oooohs & aaaahs on the photo of the restaurant.
that made my day.
now if only the employment gods would see their way clear to share their ju-ju with the Husband.
THAT would make my year.
once again, the state is burning.
we've got another fire that started last night in Montecito, an unincorporated area of Santa Barbara, a very nice, veddy rich, town about 100 miles north of us.
i didn't know this, but apparently some celebrities live up in Montecito. Oprah has a home up there. so does Rob Lowe. the news this morning is all fire, all the time - and showing a 10,000 mansion going up in smoke and flame.
while i feel sorry for anyone that loses their home because of fire, earthquake or whatever, i can't feel quite as sorry for someone with more money than should be allowed. they can rebuild and easily.
but, i do forget sometimes - life here in Mostly Smoggy So. Cal. isn't, well...always real. as the home of the movie business, we specialize in make believe.
and sometimes, all that money makes you forget that there is a real world out there, with real people and real pain.
in other news...
there's a pretty good possibility that the Husband could end the year without a permanent job. although, the Big Boss at my work is trying to get him on as a contractor.
will he be bored? probably. we do have a lot of contractors, doing proofreading and other paper-pushing jobs.
but heck, if it pays more than unemployment, then guess what? he's taking it. this year has sucked big sucky-sucks, and i'm ready for '09 and a new start - not only for us, but for the Country as a whole.
(which also makes me laugh, watching the news and they say that "Barack Obama won the election" - heck, kids - he won the election alright, but man - it ain't no prize. good luck, man!)
back to sports -
Tuesday was my last photo class. he talked about the intermediate class (that i believe i'm taking) and what to expect from it. he also talked about the two photo field trips - BIG photo field trips - one in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho and the other in northern California.
man. that would be sweet. i came home and told the Husband to hurry up and get a job so i could go.
because again, it's my world. y'all just live in it.
then we had show & tell.
probably about 10 or so of us brought photos on discs or thumbdrives. while most everyone brought photos of our two field trips in Norco & Balboa, they also included vacation photos & portraits they had shot.
silly me, i thought it was only for field trip shots. daaaang. i could've brought a TON of stuff and made 'em all sit through them, too.
kinda like going to someones home and getting stuck watching vacation video.
one older gentleman brought his pictures, not of either Norco or Balboa, but of his trip last year to Idaho. i can't remember exactly where, but there's a big falls out there and next to it is a walkway so you can walk down the waterfall to the end.
his pictures were of every step down that walkway.
OK. we get it. it's BIG. take your favorites and share. not the whole walk down.
snipe. snipe. snipe.
some of the photos that were shared were amazing. and in a good way. made me wonder what the heck they were doing there. and while most all of us shared too dang many photos of the Pavilion (myself included) i did get some good oooohs & aaaahs on the photo of the restaurant.
that made my day.
now if only the employment gods would see their way clear to share their ju-ju with the Husband.
THAT would make my year.
Oct 15, 2008
it's all becoming clear to me.
looking back, it's no wonder i am the way i am.
crazy that is.
i've told tales before of life with Crazy Auntie Kay. how she would tell me that if i would just press against my two front teeth, they would straighten out nicely and i would have no need for braces. my teeth would look just like hers.
and i did that, faithfully...for a few months. then i found out something.
Auntie Kay wore dentures. of course her teeth were perfect.
it's crap like that that stays with you for a long, long time.
take, for example, Exhibit A.
this morning, i was driving to work, when i passed a box on the side of the road. nothing unusual in that, except that immediately i heard Auntie Kay.
"when you start driving," (said when i was a teenager, before my license) "and you see a box in the road, don't you EVER drive over it."
ok, i'll bite. why?
"because people will put their unwanted babies in the box and leave it in the road so someone will drive over it and kill their baby."
OMG. you SO did not just say that.
wait...rerun tape...oh yeah, you DID just say that.
and she really did believe that. just as she believed that my mom could not willingly have sex as an unmarried woman. she HAD to have been raped.
oh yeah. she did. to the day she died, she was convinced my mom had been forced upon.
and so, some 30 years later, i see a box in the road and freak out...before i remember that the odds of that happening are as good as us winning the lotto.
the lotto, however, while it would still freak me out, would be FAR more FUN than...well, you know.
tune in next week for the newest episode of "It's Not My Parents That Screwed Me Up, It Was the Other Members of My Family."
presented without commercial interruption!
crazy that is.
i've told tales before of life with Crazy Auntie Kay. how she would tell me that if i would just press against my two front teeth, they would straighten out nicely and i would have no need for braces. my teeth would look just like hers.
and i did that, faithfully...for a few months. then i found out something.
Auntie Kay wore dentures. of course her teeth were perfect.
it's crap like that that stays with you for a long, long time.
take, for example, Exhibit A.
this morning, i was driving to work, when i passed a box on the side of the road. nothing unusual in that, except that immediately i heard Auntie Kay.
"when you start driving," (said when i was a teenager, before my license) "and you see a box in the road, don't you EVER drive over it."
ok, i'll bite. why?
"because people will put their unwanted babies in the box and leave it in the road so someone will drive over it and kill their baby."
OMG. you SO did not just say that.
wait...rerun tape...oh yeah, you DID just say that.
and she really did believe that. just as she believed that my mom could not willingly have sex as an unmarried woman. she HAD to have been raped.
oh yeah. she did. to the day she died, she was convinced my mom had been forced upon.
and so, some 30 years later, i see a box in the road and freak out...before i remember that the odds of that happening are as good as us winning the lotto.
the lotto, however, while it would still freak me out, would be FAR more FUN than...well, you know.
tune in next week for the newest episode of "It's Not My Parents That Screwed Me Up, It Was the Other Members of My Family."
presented without commercial interruption!
Sep 11, 2008
well. they'll let ANYONE on the internet these days, won't they?
well, look who's back, kids.
and i think the only reason i AM posting is because the Husband is not currently at our domicile. he's been hogging the damn thing worse-n-a crack whore.
hmmm. crack whore. that's a little strong, isn't it? so - where were we?
Brendan
after all was said and done, the first job of 2008 gave him the heave-ho. sorry, but we can't afford you. sorry, but i think you should get a clue as to how much money you make and spend before you do anything else and inconvenience anyone else in your current or former employ.
still bitter? you betcha.
he's been looking off and on, now since he's officially out of work, more on. i talked him into driving up to his brother's in Northern California to do some camping with the Bro and Bro's boys. good on them, a little male bonding is always in order. it also gave B a chance to do a road trip with the new wheels.
oh and to not shower for three or four days. gross. OH and to go poo in a hole in the ground. totally gross. once again, the Princess sez i like camping at the Marriott.
he was gone for a week. i missed him like crazy.
back to the unemployment crap - fingers crossed, kids, he got a call from a VP of HR for a company he had gotten a hit on, they want to talk to him next Tuesday. it would do everyone in the family good to have him working again. all i can say is, thank God i'm covering him on my insurance and the car payment. it would be beyond stressful (or more than it is, already) if i had that on my plate.
it's all about me. deal with it.
after all, it is my blog.
needless to say, it's been a little stressful here, and, with no 'net to vent on, well...i remember why i have a blog - it's cheaper than therapy.
last week, i had a breakdown. the kind where you work too late, walk out to your car, start crying and cry the whole.way.home.
yeah. that's fun.
at my work, we've been offloading work to overseas vendors - that sucks. it was hard enough to clear reports when everything was in one house, much less when it's in two overseas locations. so as our vendor commitments grew, so did my job. add to that we have two deadlines for our paging departments - one @ 11am, the 2nd @ 5.
i wasn't making a 5pm cut off, much less an 11am one. i hated my job.
i hated myself.
but after crying for an hour after i got home, i knew something had to give. i couldn't any more.
the next day - we on the reports team had a meeting with the graphics manager. what's going on, why are we having problems, blah, blah, blah. she started out with some other points, then went around the room and asked my compadres what teams they were responsible for, what they did, and did they feel overwhelmed?
girl #1 - oh, i care for one team. everything is good.
girl #2 - me - i care for one team, no problems here!
me - um, i care for 7 teams, i create the schedules we use and I AM COMPLETELY OVERWHELMED!
hmmmm - balance in all things, and there ain't none herebouts. the manager, having pity on me, split up seven of my teams between the three of us, and gave girl #1 one of my schedules to care for.
and yes. i feel better. but, after the meeting, the manager (who also hosted one of my showers before we got married, i've worked for for years and am friends with) came by my desk and says, 'do you feel better?'
well, yes. it's just been so much, and...
manager: i know. you've got too much on your plate, and not only that, i know it's bad when i see you and you look like shi....ca-ca.
well. that's reassuring. not only am i not doing my job, but apparently i look like poop.
manager - you lost your smile. i need that.
i do too. i just wasn't finding anything to smile about.
i am now.
now just give my Husband a job and i'll be freaking hysterical.
i started school Tuesday - a photography class offered by the local community college. 10 weeks of one night a week that's all about me.
i'm so superficial.
we'll be covering f-stops and all the stuff i have no idea how to do. then at the end of the class we go on two field trips - Balboa Island and another location to be named later.
cool, huh?
i'm really excited about it. i cannot wait till Tuesdays.
there you go, Gentle Reader. a way too long synopsis on what's going on in our bloody boring lives.
and to think you waited weeks for this.
it's good to be back.
and i think the only reason i AM posting is because the Husband is not currently at our domicile. he's been hogging the damn thing worse-n-a crack whore.
hmmm. crack whore. that's a little strong, isn't it? so - where were we?
Brendan
after all was said and done, the first job of 2008 gave him the heave-ho. sorry, but we can't afford you. sorry, but i think you should get a clue as to how much money you make and spend before you do anything else and inconvenience anyone else in your current or former employ.
still bitter? you betcha.
he's been looking off and on, now since he's officially out of work, more on. i talked him into driving up to his brother's in Northern California to do some camping with the Bro and Bro's boys. good on them, a little male bonding is always in order. it also gave B a chance to do a road trip with the new wheels.
oh and to not shower for three or four days. gross. OH and to go poo in a hole in the ground. totally gross. once again, the Princess sez i like camping at the Marriott.
he was gone for a week. i missed him like crazy.
back to the unemployment crap - fingers crossed, kids, he got a call from a VP of HR for a company he had gotten a hit on, they want to talk to him next Tuesday. it would do everyone in the family good to have him working again. all i can say is, thank God i'm covering him on my insurance and the car payment. it would be beyond stressful (or more than it is, already) if i had that on my plate.
it's all about me. deal with it.
after all, it is my blog.
needless to say, it's been a little stressful here, and, with no 'net to vent on, well...i remember why i have a blog - it's cheaper than therapy.
last week, i had a breakdown. the kind where you work too late, walk out to your car, start crying and cry the whole.way.home.
yeah. that's fun.
at my work, we've been offloading work to overseas vendors - that sucks. it was hard enough to clear reports when everything was in one house, much less when it's in two overseas locations. so as our vendor commitments grew, so did my job. add to that we have two deadlines for our paging departments - one @ 11am, the 2nd @ 5.
i wasn't making a 5pm cut off, much less an 11am one. i hated my job.
i hated myself.
but after crying for an hour after i got home, i knew something had to give. i couldn't any more.
the next day - we on the reports team had a meeting with the graphics manager. what's going on, why are we having problems, blah, blah, blah. she started out with some other points, then went around the room and asked my compadres what teams they were responsible for, what they did, and did they feel overwhelmed?
girl #1 - oh, i care for one team. everything is good.
girl #2 - me - i care for one team, no problems here!
me - um, i care for 7 teams, i create the schedules we use and I AM COMPLETELY OVERWHELMED!
hmmmm - balance in all things, and there ain't none herebouts. the manager, having pity on me, split up seven of my teams between the three of us, and gave girl #1 one of my schedules to care for.
and yes. i feel better. but, after the meeting, the manager (who also hosted one of my showers before we got married, i've worked for for years and am friends with) came by my desk and says, 'do you feel better?'
well, yes. it's just been so much, and...
manager: i know. you've got too much on your plate, and not only that, i know it's bad when i see you and you look like shi....ca-ca.
well. that's reassuring. not only am i not doing my job, but apparently i look like poop.
manager - you lost your smile. i need that.
i do too. i just wasn't finding anything to smile about.
i am now.
now just give my Husband a job and i'll be freaking hysterical.
i started school Tuesday - a photography class offered by the local community college. 10 weeks of one night a week that's all about me.
i'm so superficial.
we'll be covering f-stops and all the stuff i have no idea how to do. then at the end of the class we go on two field trips - Balboa Island and another location to be named later.
cool, huh?
i'm really excited about it. i cannot wait till Tuesdays.
there you go, Gentle Reader. a way too long synopsis on what's going on in our bloody boring lives.
and to think you waited weeks for this.
it's good to be back.
Jun 2, 2008
dodging bullets.
jury duty today.
oh joy.
i don't know what it is about jury duty that turns every dang one of us into a bunch of crybabies. myself included.
now, if it came down to me needing a jury of my peers, well, all i can say is i want the system to work, as it usually does every day in America.
but i also know that there's a lot of idiots out there. a lot. and i'm not sure i want them as a jury of my peers.
of course, there's the fact that if i was stupid enough to get arrested and put on trial for something, then apparently i get what i deserve.
on the bright side, since i had my service rescheduled from last November, to April to now, i got to go to Fullerton, not too far from our casa, and much nicer than driving to the county seat of Santa Ana.
downtown Santa Ana.
with the occasional gang problem. that i have to drive the 5 freeway to. (ed. note: the 5, is a main artery going from San Diego in the South all the way up to the California state line, and beyond. it gets crowded. a lot. especially since it goes by most of the major Mostly Smoggy Southern California attractions)
so i gladly will take Fullerton. 'sides, they have a totally cool Old Town and some bad ass vintage and antique stores. a good vibe it has.
and i got to drive the Buick. why, where is your car, you ask? oh, it would be at the radiator ship, getting pressure flushed and all new hoses put in.
nice.
yesterday, B decided to replace my air filter and check the oil. then, on a whim, he checked my radiator, which apparently had more sludge than Washington DC.
so this place came recommended to us, and as they flushed, they told B that my hoses needed replacing.
see - everything falls apart after 45.
anywhoooo - they are keeping my car until tomorrow afternoon, and lucky Brendan, he gets to get up early when i do, so he can take me to work.
ah, the Luck of the Irish indeed.
while at jury duty, i was busy attending a pity party in my honor, when smack in the middle of it, one of my Voices in my Head (the smarter, more sensible one, as you will see) walked over to me and smacked me in the back of my head.
'um, hello?! do you not realize how lucky you are?'
lucky? me?? have you not noticed that half of our household is unemployed, i may bloody well be as well and my freaking car is being repaired for the tune of $300?
'you are lucky. you are working. you have the money to fix, and things could be worse. you are not only lucky, you're blessed and you should hit the ground and thank God for your blessings.'
man. i hate it when she's right.
it's all a matter of prospective. the forest vs. the trees. it reminds me of one of my favorite 'Far Side' cartoon about the four types of personalities. the first one joyfully sees the glass as half full, the second as, naturally, half empty. the third is confused about the glass and what was that question again?
the last one says, irritated, 'hey! i ordered a cheeseburger!'
that one is me. occasionally missing the point altogether.
so i am blessed. we have the money to fix the car, the timing just sucks.
and to add to my blessings, i got excused from jury duty around 11:45, no more cases that needed juries that day.
i felt like i did on the last day of school.
blessed beyond reason. i just need smacked around sometimes to realize that.
oh joy.
i don't know what it is about jury duty that turns every dang one of us into a bunch of crybabies. myself included.
now, if it came down to me needing a jury of my peers, well, all i can say is i want the system to work, as it usually does every day in America.
but i also know that there's a lot of idiots out there. a lot. and i'm not sure i want them as a jury of my peers.
of course, there's the fact that if i was stupid enough to get arrested and put on trial for something, then apparently i get what i deserve.
on the bright side, since i had my service rescheduled from last November, to April to now, i got to go to Fullerton, not too far from our casa, and much nicer than driving to the county seat of Santa Ana.
downtown Santa Ana.
with the occasional gang problem. that i have to drive the 5 freeway to. (ed. note: the 5, is a main artery going from San Diego in the South all the way up to the California state line, and beyond. it gets crowded. a lot. especially since it goes by most of the major Mostly Smoggy Southern California attractions)
so i gladly will take Fullerton. 'sides, they have a totally cool Old Town and some bad ass vintage and antique stores. a good vibe it has.
and i got to drive the Buick. why, where is your car, you ask? oh, it would be at the radiator ship, getting pressure flushed and all new hoses put in.
nice.
yesterday, B decided to replace my air filter and check the oil. then, on a whim, he checked my radiator, which apparently had more sludge than Washington DC.
so this place came recommended to us, and as they flushed, they told B that my hoses needed replacing.
see - everything falls apart after 45.
anywhoooo - they are keeping my car until tomorrow afternoon, and lucky Brendan, he gets to get up early when i do, so he can take me to work.
ah, the Luck of the Irish indeed.
while at jury duty, i was busy attending a pity party in my honor, when smack in the middle of it, one of my Voices in my Head (the smarter, more sensible one, as you will see) walked over to me and smacked me in the back of my head.
'um, hello?! do you not realize how lucky you are?'
lucky? me?? have you not noticed that half of our household is unemployed, i may bloody well be as well and my freaking car is being repaired for the tune of $300?
'you are lucky. you are working. you have the money to fix, and things could be worse. you are not only lucky, you're blessed and you should hit the ground and thank God for your blessings.'
man. i hate it when she's right.
it's all a matter of prospective. the forest vs. the trees. it reminds me of one of my favorite 'Far Side' cartoon about the four types of personalities. the first one joyfully sees the glass as half full, the second as, naturally, half empty. the third is confused about the glass and what was that question again?
the last one says, irritated, 'hey! i ordered a cheeseburger!'
that one is me. occasionally missing the point altogether.
so i am blessed. we have the money to fix the car, the timing just sucks.
and to add to my blessings, i got excused from jury duty around 11:45, no more cases that needed juries that day.
i felt like i did on the last day of school.
blessed beyond reason. i just need smacked around sometimes to realize that.
Jun 1, 2008
welcome back to the real world.
so even with the drama of layoffs on Thursday, the rest of my birthday did get better.
i got home before the B-man, who had a 'conversation,' with a prospective employer (apparently they are very afraid of commitment, so it can't be an interview.), who thought they might be able to create a position for him.
just not right now.
well thank you very much, that'll work out just fine because i need a job, but just not right now.
hmmmm. apparently age has not lessened my sarcasm.
moving on...
the Husband came home after stopping at a grocery store with some red roses, a bottle of chardonnay, Caesar salad, vanilla cupcakes and tiramasu and frozen mac and cheese.
this guy gets me.
i got to sit on my butt, licking my wounds from the earlier fun of the day while he broiled some steaks, tossed salad (in the good way) and heated the mac & cheese.
oh and don't forget the wine.
my dinner was served and i ate like the chunky, non-Weight Watcher chick i am. i talked to April and Kristie, the former thinks she should talk to me more often when i'm drunk.
(i didn't want to burst her bubble, but honey, that was nothing.)
in short, my birthday was a lot like life. kinda roller coaster-y. big build ups, pee in the pants as you roll down a hill to your certain death, and the whole time laughing.
or maybe that's just me.
in either case - while it's not fun, it's life. it's the only shot we get, unless you subscribe to reincarnation, but personally, i don't want to come back as a bunny rabbit on my path to enlightenment.
i know too many people that would be after me, looking to see me in their pot. braising. and i'm just not cool with that.
what can i say - living agrees with me.
i got home before the B-man, who had a 'conversation,' with a prospective employer (apparently they are very afraid of commitment, so it can't be an interview.), who thought they might be able to create a position for him.
just not right now.
well thank you very much, that'll work out just fine because i need a job, but just not right now.
hmmmm. apparently age has not lessened my sarcasm.
moving on...
the Husband came home after stopping at a grocery store with some red roses, a bottle of chardonnay, Caesar salad, vanilla cupcakes and tiramasu and frozen mac and cheese.
this guy gets me.
i got to sit on my butt, licking my wounds from the earlier fun of the day while he broiled some steaks, tossed salad (in the good way) and heated the mac & cheese.
oh and don't forget the wine.
my dinner was served and i ate like the chunky, non-Weight Watcher chick i am. i talked to April and Kristie, the former thinks she should talk to me more often when i'm drunk.
(i didn't want to burst her bubble, but honey, that was nothing.)
in short, my birthday was a lot like life. kinda roller coaster-y. big build ups, pee in the pants as you roll down a hill to your certain death, and the whole time laughing.
or maybe that's just me.
in either case - while it's not fun, it's life. it's the only shot we get, unless you subscribe to reincarnation, but personally, i don't want to come back as a bunny rabbit on my path to enlightenment.
i know too many people that would be after me, looking to see me in their pot. braising. and i'm just not cool with that.
what can i say - living agrees with me.
Apr 14, 2008
what's happening in the clean world?
well then.
i think that's enough silence for, oh - say a monastery, wouldn't you?
and no worries, all is well in O'Mahonyville. just a few bad patches in a sucky year. believe me when i say that 2008 has blown.huge.chunks. and i will be truly glad to kiss it goodbye.
no tongue.
so - let's catch up, shall we?
B is still gainfully unemployed. the employer in San Diego turned him down for another candidate, and, while Brendan was ranting about how he was the best person for this job, i countered with reminding him that a) the job wasn't meant to be, so he should just get over it (i know. i am SO sympathetic), and b) the job wasn't meant to be because remember? we would need to move. THAT COSTS MONEY. and even if we didn't move right away, there would be the commuting. WHICH ALSO COSTS MONEY.
and c) if i had to, i would take the commuter train, but wasn't relishing spending 2-3 hours of my day on the bloody Metrolink.
which brings us to the job he's been chasing, right around the corner from our casa. they've played grab-ass for a few weeks now; employer making an offer, B countering with a slightly higher offer, employer saying no, well, what about this amount, B coming back with another offer. finally, employer said well, let me think that one over, call me in a few days.
B calls back in a few days. employer says, 'hey, you were supposed to call me on Friday.' B replies no, we decided on Thursday, remember? employer says, 'oh. you're right. well, sorry, but i can't swing that amount.' B thanks him for his time, and tells him to keep his resume on file.
B's fine. i'm pissed. this guy had already decided that he wasn't willing to pay what Brendan was asking, but did not have the common courtesy to call him and let him know before Brendan had to call? sheesh.
if he treats people like this who don't work for him, imagine what it must be like to work for this man.
but really...i've let it go.
really.
so - other than that...my mom says she's doing better with her knee healing after surgery, but, since she's compensating for the bad one, her good one is acting up. i know she's not feeling well when she cancels on her quilting social groups.
such a thing just does not happen.
i'm hoping she can get in to some PT soon...it made a difference with my back and i only regret i didn't get in before i went back to work.
meanwhile...i'm looking for a pedicure, a massage and peace for my soul.
oh, and a winning lotto ticket so i can sit around all day taking cooking & photography classes and making slightly cuter stuff out of other stuff.
if only.
i think that's enough silence for, oh - say a monastery, wouldn't you?
and no worries, all is well in O'Mahonyville. just a few bad patches in a sucky year. believe me when i say that 2008 has blown.huge.chunks. and i will be truly glad to kiss it goodbye.
no tongue.
so - let's catch up, shall we?
B is still gainfully unemployed. the employer in San Diego turned him down for another candidate, and, while Brendan was ranting about how he was the best person for this job, i countered with reminding him that a) the job wasn't meant to be, so he should just get over it (i know. i am SO sympathetic), and b) the job wasn't meant to be because remember? we would need to move. THAT COSTS MONEY. and even if we didn't move right away, there would be the commuting. WHICH ALSO COSTS MONEY.
and c) if i had to, i would take the commuter train, but wasn't relishing spending 2-3 hours of my day on the bloody Metrolink.
which brings us to the job he's been chasing, right around the corner from our casa. they've played grab-ass for a few weeks now; employer making an offer, B countering with a slightly higher offer, employer saying no, well, what about this amount, B coming back with another offer. finally, employer said well, let me think that one over, call me in a few days.
B calls back in a few days. employer says, 'hey, you were supposed to call me on Friday.' B replies no, we decided on Thursday, remember? employer says, 'oh. you're right. well, sorry, but i can't swing that amount.' B thanks him for his time, and tells him to keep his resume on file.
B's fine. i'm pissed. this guy had already decided that he wasn't willing to pay what Brendan was asking, but did not have the common courtesy to call him and let him know before Brendan had to call? sheesh.
if he treats people like this who don't work for him, imagine what it must be like to work for this man.
but really...i've let it go.
really.
so - other than that...my mom says she's doing better with her knee healing after surgery, but, since she's compensating for the bad one, her good one is acting up. i know she's not feeling well when she cancels on her quilting social groups.
such a thing just does not happen.
i'm hoping she can get in to some PT soon...it made a difference with my back and i only regret i didn't get in before i went back to work.
meanwhile...i'm looking for a pedicure, a massage and peace for my soul.
oh, and a winning lotto ticket so i can sit around all day taking cooking & photography classes and making slightly cuter stuff out of other stuff.
if only.
Mar 12, 2008
it's all for a reason.
this all started Monday.
my boss came in Monday Morning with one red, swollen eyeball. it made me gasp.
and i'm not a gasper.
but he wouldn't go to the doctor. 'it's allergies,' he said.
allergies my left foot. i have allergies. my eye doesn't look like that when i get an allergy attack.
i gave him my bottle of allergy eye drops. believe me, i don't want that back. it's pinkeye, i tell him.
no, he says. allergies.
allergic to the doctor, i think.
Tuesday morning.
same uggy looking eye.
same stubborn man.
enter our department manager. who sends him home. go to the doctor, she says. people will complain.
um, hello?! i've been complaining.
thank heavens, he went to the urgent care. guess what? it was allergies.
psych.
that would be pinkeye. p-i-n-k-e-y-e.
so because he was gone for the day, i didn't get to leave work early enough.
i missed my flight to Reno.
so as i stood there rebooking my ticket and crying, a very sweet woman came up to me and said 'is it going better?"
no it's not, i missed my flight and it's been horrible at work and at home...sob, boo hoo, waaaah.
'honey,' she said, putting her arm around me. 'there's a reason you're not supposed to be on that plane.'
that shut me up.
'seriously.' she says. 'it doesn't mean that the plane is going down, but there is a reason you were to miss this flight. everything happens for a reason. you just remember that.'
that woman was my angel yesterday. i really believe God sent her to me just to keep me on track and remind me that even though i want to believe it's all about me, there really is a Bigger Picture out there, and i lose sight of that.
frequently.
i'm constantly telling Brendan that things happen for a reason. i can't explain the reasons but there is a reason and everything works the way it's supposed to. so, no, there was no plane crash last night.
but i'll never know the reason why i wasn't to make that flight.
thanks NiceDeltaLady. you put me back in perspective.
tonight: Keith!
my boss came in Monday Morning with one red, swollen eyeball. it made me gasp.
and i'm not a gasper.
but he wouldn't go to the doctor. 'it's allergies,' he said.
allergies my left foot. i have allergies. my eye doesn't look like that when i get an allergy attack.
i gave him my bottle of allergy eye drops. believe me, i don't want that back. it's pinkeye, i tell him.
no, he says. allergies.
allergic to the doctor, i think.
Tuesday morning.
same uggy looking eye.
same stubborn man.
enter our department manager. who sends him home. go to the doctor, she says. people will complain.
um, hello?! i've been complaining.
thank heavens, he went to the urgent care. guess what? it was allergies.
psych.
that would be pinkeye. p-i-n-k-e-y-e.
so because he was gone for the day, i didn't get to leave work early enough.
i missed my flight to Reno.
so as i stood there rebooking my ticket and crying, a very sweet woman came up to me and said 'is it going better?"
no it's not, i missed my flight and it's been horrible at work and at home...sob, boo hoo, waaaah.
'honey,' she said, putting her arm around me. 'there's a reason you're not supposed to be on that plane.'
that shut me up.
'seriously.' she says. 'it doesn't mean that the plane is going down, but there is a reason you were to miss this flight. everything happens for a reason. you just remember that.'
that woman was my angel yesterday. i really believe God sent her to me just to keep me on track and remind me that even though i want to believe it's all about me, there really is a Bigger Picture out there, and i lose sight of that.
frequently.
i'm constantly telling Brendan that things happen for a reason. i can't explain the reasons but there is a reason and everything works the way it's supposed to. so, no, there was no plane crash last night.
but i'll never know the reason why i wasn't to make that flight.
thanks NiceDeltaLady. you put me back in perspective.
tonight: Keith!
Nov 16, 2007
all 'round the block...
i have not been kidnapped, abducted by aliens or sold into white slavery because i stopped to speak to a stranger asking directions.
which, kids, you should never ever do.
thus concludes your public service announcement for today.
no. it was far, far worse than that.
the Husband, in an attempt to not stay up all night doing homework (read dickin' around on the computer), has been taking the laptop with him to work and working on stuff during his breaks and lunches.
meanwhile, i go through withdrawals and wonder what i can do to fill my time in the afternoons.
read to kids? naaah. bake pies for the shelter? are you crazy? there are blogs to be read! emails to delete, er...respond to! shopping! there is shopping to be done! ONLINE!!!
and it has been a week.
Mom had an MRI today for her leg. you see, many moons ago, she fell at work (hmmm! could this be where my natural grace comes from?!) over boxes someone left around a blind corner. and occasionally, she tweaks herself wrong, and well...turns her into a frightful mess.
did i mention my poor Mom hates MRIs? poor woman would rather listen to the caterwauling of tone deaf tomcats as the Angelina Jolie of the catworld strutted by, than to go into THE TUBE OF DEATH.
even with drugs, she freaks out. and lucky her, she just got over a migraine this a.m. just in time to be launched into THE TUBE OF DEATH.
so she can get another migraine. lucky, lucky her.
and this week at work there is talk about starting a 5am shift.
5am? good mooglie googlie.
kids, i am SO not a morning person. a pleasant personality for me starts to develop around nine.
p.m.
so, of course, if i have to start at 5, i will. and let me tell you now, Gentle Reader, start buying stock in Coca-Cola and Starbucks.
because i will single-handed make it rise tenfold.
wait...there's a question from the back? yes? can you please speak a little louder? why are they considering a 5am shift?
why to deal with the East Coast sales reps for our company, naturally.
the ones that will be contacting us for questions regarding their ads.
because their former graphics' office in Valley Forge is being eliminated.
yep. the office i spent soooo much time in last summer is being closed early in '08.
they were told on Thursday.
Happy freaking Holidays, huh?
someone out there asked, and rightly so, why they were being closed now, why not last year when they were doing so horribly?
a great question. with no good answer.
as i've told y'all before, i've been at my company for 20 years. i have survived five layoffs. three at my location and two at other locations.
there but for the Grace of God.
i feel for them. the few that did bother to talk to me seemed really nice. fun people.
people who have mortgages, kids and bills. just like the rest of us.
and although it's 'just business,' it still sucks for people who life still goes on.
in other news...
today, i woke up @ 3:45.
did you know there's a 3:45 these days? whoever planned it sucks.
anywhoooo...
woke up. had to use the *ahem* powder room. could.not.go.back.to.sleep. so i did what every good scrapper/crafter/player of glue & paper does...
i played.
yep. 4 am and i'm trying to open my eyes enough to see the glue i'm trying to attach to some wooden letters.
it's a sickness, i tells ya.
so now, i'm ready for bed.
and really, really hoping that 3:45 stays right where it is.
away from me.
which, kids, you should never ever do.
thus concludes your public service announcement for today.
no. it was far, far worse than that.
the Husband, in an attempt to not stay up all night doing homework (read dickin' around on the computer), has been taking the laptop with him to work and working on stuff during his breaks and lunches.
meanwhile, i go through withdrawals and wonder what i can do to fill my time in the afternoons.
read to kids? naaah. bake pies for the shelter? are you crazy? there are blogs to be read! emails to delete, er...respond to! shopping! there is shopping to be done! ONLINE!!!
and it has been a week.
Mom had an MRI today for her leg. you see, many moons ago, she fell at work (hmmm! could this be where my natural grace comes from?!) over boxes someone left around a blind corner. and occasionally, she tweaks herself wrong, and well...turns her into a frightful mess.
did i mention my poor Mom hates MRIs? poor woman would rather listen to the caterwauling of tone deaf tomcats as the Angelina Jolie of the catworld strutted by, than to go into THE TUBE OF DEATH.
even with drugs, she freaks out. and lucky her, she just got over a migraine this a.m. just in time to be launched into THE TUBE OF DEATH.
so she can get another migraine. lucky, lucky her.
and this week at work there is talk about starting a 5am shift.
5am? good mooglie googlie.
kids, i am SO not a morning person. a pleasant personality for me starts to develop around nine.
p.m.
so, of course, if i have to start at 5, i will. and let me tell you now, Gentle Reader, start buying stock in Coca-Cola and Starbucks.
because i will single-handed make it rise tenfold.
wait...there's a question from the back? yes? can you please speak a little louder? why are they considering a 5am shift?
why to deal with the East Coast sales reps for our company, naturally.
the ones that will be contacting us for questions regarding their ads.
because their former graphics' office in Valley Forge is being eliminated.
yep. the office i spent soooo much time in last summer is being closed early in '08.
they were told on Thursday.
Happy freaking Holidays, huh?
someone out there asked, and rightly so, why they were being closed now, why not last year when they were doing so horribly?
a great question. with no good answer.
as i've told y'all before, i've been at my company for 20 years. i have survived five layoffs. three at my location and two at other locations.
there but for the Grace of God.
i feel for them. the few that did bother to talk to me seemed really nice. fun people.
people who have mortgages, kids and bills. just like the rest of us.
and although it's 'just business,' it still sucks for people who life still goes on.
in other news...
today, i woke up @ 3:45.
did you know there's a 3:45 these days? whoever planned it sucks.
anywhoooo...
woke up. had to use the *ahem* powder room. could.not.go.back.to.sleep. so i did what every good scrapper/crafter/player of glue & paper does...
i played.
yep. 4 am and i'm trying to open my eyes enough to see the glue i'm trying to attach to some wooden letters.
it's a sickness, i tells ya.
so now, i'm ready for bed.
and really, really hoping that 3:45 stays right where it is.
away from me.
Nov 5, 2007
celebrate me home.
over the weekend, i got an email. which is nothing really unusual, i get soooo many.
most of which want me to use Viagra.
lucky me.
but in between the offers for watches, scrapbook items, and yes Viagra, i got an invitation.
from a chick i work with.
for a combo housewarming-slash-40th birthday party.
wait...what? let me re-read that.
yep. she's throwing herself a birthday party AND a housewarming party.
see - it goes like this: this girl talks smack about her grandmother. all.the.time. horrible things. disrespectful things. just mean stuff. then her grandmother passed away unexpectedly.
and her mother gave this girl her grandmother's condo.
and paid to have it repainted, re carpeted and re designed.
and put cash into an account so this girl will never pay property tax or association fees.
and this girl doesn't have to pay any of the payments.
she is lucky. but i don't think she appreciates it. i know her brothers are still peeved about it.
so - here she is, planning a housewarming and birthday soiree. for about 40 people.
i think it's gonna be like me hosting that many people here in our apartment. especially since her condo IS a converted apartment.
but what i wonder is...do i get her two gifts? 'cuz that's what it is looking like. and i hate feeling obligated to buy someone a gift.
it doesn't bother me at birthdays or Christmas...or even Groundhogs day. i love shopping for other people. especially for the 'perfect' (or what i hope is perfect) gift.
unfortunately, this girl doesn't realize how blessed she really is. and how horribly she treats people.
more to follow.
in other news...
yes, the writers are on strike. and yes, i'm still waiting for someone...anyone...to call and give me a big break.
Hollywood, i'm here. call me.
not only can i pretend to write, i can pretend to cook and fill up the Green Room.
see? double threat.
one more thing...prayers if you would, for my April, Susie & Pat. they've each got some heavy cruddy loads lately.
i thank you. and so would they.
most of which want me to use Viagra.
lucky me.
but in between the offers for watches, scrapbook items, and yes Viagra, i got an invitation.
from a chick i work with.
for a combo housewarming-slash-40th birthday party.
wait...what? let me re-read that.
yep. she's throwing herself a birthday party AND a housewarming party.
see - it goes like this: this girl talks smack about her grandmother. all.the.time. horrible things. disrespectful things. just mean stuff. then her grandmother passed away unexpectedly.
and her mother gave this girl her grandmother's condo.
and paid to have it repainted, re carpeted and re designed.
and put cash into an account so this girl will never pay property tax or association fees.
and this girl doesn't have to pay any of the payments.
she is lucky. but i don't think she appreciates it. i know her brothers are still peeved about it.
so - here she is, planning a housewarming and birthday soiree. for about 40 people.
i think it's gonna be like me hosting that many people here in our apartment. especially since her condo IS a converted apartment.
but what i wonder is...do i get her two gifts? 'cuz that's what it is looking like. and i hate feeling obligated to buy someone a gift.
it doesn't bother me at birthdays or Christmas...or even Groundhogs day. i love shopping for other people. especially for the 'perfect' (or what i hope is perfect) gift.
unfortunately, this girl doesn't realize how blessed she really is. and how horribly she treats people.
more to follow.
in other news...
yes, the writers are on strike. and yes, i'm still waiting for someone...anyone...to call and give me a big break.
Hollywood, i'm here. call me.
not only can i pretend to write, i can pretend to cook and fill up the Green Room.
see? double threat.
one more thing...prayers if you would, for my April, Susie & Pat. they've each got some heavy cruddy loads lately.
i thank you. and so would they.
Oct 22, 2007
well, DUH.
and no...it's not fuzzy. it's haze. from the smoke.now i know what smoked salmon feels like.
Jul 31, 2007
when i'm in charge...
something happens to me when i eat chips 'n' dip.
i feel, almost....invincible.
and i get all sort of weird-ass ideas.
so. if i run for President (why not? everyone else is. any day i expect to see my teacher from my high school Bible studies class announcing his candidacy.), here's my list of campaign promises.
and believe me, these will be kept.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 1
any young up & coming star, upon the release of their first big movie/show/record, will immediately be issued a car and driver. no more of this inability to hold one's liquor and then drive home. or to a friend's house, their drug dealer or even to church. nope, never again.
no more Paris, Nicole, Lindsay or even that really cute guy from Prison Break. it's bad enough when they destroy someones property, but in the case of the Prison Break guy, kids died.
refusal to do so, or to "forget" you had a driver will immediately result in all your cash goin' back to the studio/label.
oh, and mandatory jail time. in a real jail. not this secluded Club Fed crap. for.the.whole.sentence.
*sigh* makes me wish for the good ol' days when the worst thing that happened was someone getting caught with hookers.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 2
if you're convicted of a crime, you will do the time. no appeals. no "get outta jail free cards."
OJ & Barretta, i'm talkin' to you.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 3
all desserts hereafter will be holy and void of all calories. consider them freebies, like carrots, celery, etc.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 4
(lifted from one of my favorite movies, Fried Green Tomatoes) all supermodels under a size 12 will be banned from any and all ads. also, designers will establish their lines for said size 12 & up and will price them reasonably so the rest of us can afford to buy some without having to sell their children/pets/houses.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 5
all abusers/abandoners of babies, children and animals will be drawn and quartered. i don't want to hear about liberty & justice for all. they forfeited their rights to that when they abused. 'nuff said.
oh, and Alton Brown will be secretary of good eats (a new post i'm creating), Donny Osmond my chief of staff and Clint Eastwood will be head of Homeland Security.
vote for me.
i feel, almost....invincible.
and i get all sort of weird-ass ideas.
so. if i run for President (why not? everyone else is. any day i expect to see my teacher from my high school Bible studies class announcing his candidacy.), here's my list of campaign promises.
and believe me, these will be kept.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 1
any young up & coming star, upon the release of their first big movie/show/record, will immediately be issued a car and driver. no more of this inability to hold one's liquor and then drive home. or to a friend's house, their drug dealer or even to church. nope, never again.
no more Paris, Nicole, Lindsay or even that really cute guy from Prison Break. it's bad enough when they destroy someones property, but in the case of the Prison Break guy, kids died.
refusal to do so, or to "forget" you had a driver will immediately result in all your cash goin' back to the studio/label.
oh, and mandatory jail time. in a real jail. not this secluded Club Fed crap. for.the.whole.sentence.
*sigh* makes me wish for the good ol' days when the worst thing that happened was someone getting caught with hookers.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 2
if you're convicted of a crime, you will do the time. no appeals. no "get outta jail free cards."
OJ & Barretta, i'm talkin' to you.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 3
all desserts hereafter will be holy and void of all calories. consider them freebies, like carrots, celery, etc.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 4
(lifted from one of my favorite movies, Fried Green Tomatoes) all supermodels under a size 12 will be banned from any and all ads. also, designers will establish their lines for said size 12 & up and will price them reasonably so the rest of us can afford to buy some without having to sell their children/pets/houses.
CAMPAIGN PROMISE 5
all abusers/abandoners of babies, children and animals will be drawn and quartered. i don't want to hear about liberty & justice for all. they forfeited their rights to that when they abused. 'nuff said.
oh, and Alton Brown will be secretary of good eats (a new post i'm creating), Donny Osmond my chief of staff and Clint Eastwood will be head of Homeland Security.
vote for me.
Jun 18, 2007
oh Steff...
don't hate me.
love - me :o)
oh, who am i kidding!
here's part 3 of the top ten catagories of me.
8 THINGS I WEAR EVERYDAY
1. my wedding rings
2. earrings
3. my nose stud
4. shoes - much to my chagrin
5. mascara. it ain't pretty if i don't.
6. underwear (and all the people said AMEN)
7. a toe ring
8. a tan. oh, who am i kidding? i'm as white as the snow on the hilltop.
love - me :o)
oh, who am i kidding!
here's part 3 of the top ten catagories of me.
8 THINGS I WEAR EVERYDAY
1. my wedding rings
2. earrings
3. my nose stud
4. shoes - much to my chagrin
5. mascara. it ain't pretty if i don't.
6. underwear (and all the people said AMEN)
7. a toe ring
8. a tan. oh, who am i kidding? i'm as white as the snow on the hilltop.
Jun 13, 2007
holy crap, he's at it again.
stop me if i've told you this before...
a few years ago, the Big Boss asked me to give a presentation on my job, what i do, and how what the ad designers do (and don't do) effect me every day.
no problem. i can yak up a storm.
after my spiel, i asked if anyone had any questions. and, from the back of the room, a hand popped up, and here was the question:
"yeah, what's your real hair color?"
ha. ha. very funny. so funny i forgot to laugh.
this guy (yes, it's a guy) really has the mannerisms of a clod of dirt. he thinks he's being funny, and seven times out of ten, no - he's not. what he says is not always (or intended to be) hurtful.
he's just an idiot.
well - he's done it again.
checking my work email this a.m., and i see he sent me something after i left work last night. it's entitled "the UNemployable"
and the first line, direct from his own fingers... "this is going to be you in a couple of years!"
not a threat, kids...it's pictures. of people. with lotsa piercings. through the chin, the tongue, the eyebrows...
ha.
the funny thing is, despite my current PMS status, i'm not angry. i'm just hurt.
a little sensitive, i know, but why he thinks things like this is funny, and to make the jokes at others expense, well...
the pictures, in case you were wondering, really were gross. and ew, not something you should be sending through company email.
and not something to send to a chick with a nose piercing, dyed hair and PMS.
a few years ago, the Big Boss asked me to give a presentation on my job, what i do, and how what the ad designers do (and don't do) effect me every day.
no problem. i can yak up a storm.
after my spiel, i asked if anyone had any questions. and, from the back of the room, a hand popped up, and here was the question:
"yeah, what's your real hair color?"
ha. ha. very funny. so funny i forgot to laugh.
this guy (yes, it's a guy) really has the mannerisms of a clod of dirt. he thinks he's being funny, and seven times out of ten, no - he's not. what he says is not always (or intended to be) hurtful.
he's just an idiot.
well - he's done it again.
checking my work email this a.m., and i see he sent me something after i left work last night. it's entitled "the UNemployable"
and the first line, direct from his own fingers... "this is going to be you in a couple of years!"
not a threat, kids...it's pictures. of people. with lotsa piercings. through the chin, the tongue, the eyebrows...
ha.
the funny thing is, despite my current PMS status, i'm not angry. i'm just hurt.
a little sensitive, i know, but why he thinks things like this is funny, and to make the jokes at others expense, well...
the pictures, in case you were wondering, really were gross. and ew, not something you should be sending through company email.
and not something to send to a chick with a nose piercing, dyed hair and PMS.
Jun 4, 2007
and now for something completely different...
borrowed with intention of giving back from smileymamat..and thanks for stopping by!
1. Elaborate on your avatar. would if i could, but i still cannot figure out how to add one. guess i need brains. and patience.
2.What's your current relationship status? oh so married. and oh so loving it.
3. Ever have a near-death experience? oh yeah. my mom & i were broadsided by a drunk when i was 20. not a good scene.
4. What is the name of the song that's stuck in your head right now? the theme for Good Eats. only because the show just came on. hey - it's better than "it's a small world".
5. Name a celebrity you would marry? the only one i think i could live with, without killing because of his seemingly lack of ego: George Clooney. he just seems like a real grown up. and the fact that he's adorable, even with gray hair, doesn't hurt much either.
6. Who will cut and paste this meme first? hmmmm...Linda? Allison?
7. Has anyone ever said you look like a celebrity? Benji? no. seriously, the only time is when the mail guy @ work said i looked like the girl from Gilmore Girls. i was totally flattered...until i realized he meant the chubby one. not that she's not cute, but, well...you know.
8. Do you wear a watch? What kind? i go back and forth. right now, no. but next week, who knows?!
9. Do you have anything pierced? oh yeah. two holes in each ear (but the top two i have let close up and the baby nose. you shoulda seen what i made the stud in my nose do today.
10. Do you have any tattoos? as much as i would like to, because it would totally go with my hippy persona, i gotta say no. i'm a big chicken. and if i change my mind, i'm stuck.
11. Do you like pain? oh no. and even if i did, you think i'd admit it here? sheesh. but no.not a chance.
12. Do you like to shop? oh yeah...groceries, scrapbook supplies, books, records...
13. The last thing you paid for with cash? my lunch.
14. The last thing you paid for with credit card? my last trip to Reno. i'm due for a fix. for Reno, that is, not a credit card binge.
15. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? the Husband - he was on his way home and looking for some meatballs in his spaghetti. grrr..
16. What is on your desktop background? an ocean scene...sigh. albino girl would love to be at the beach right about now...with SPF 5000.
17. What was the last movie you watched? Dreamgirls. i swear, i've worn a hole in the middle of the DVD.
18. What was the last book you read? Paula Deen's autobiography. right now i'm working on "Son of a Witch," by the same man who wrote "Wicked." but it's a dark, hard read. i gotta augment it with "Ball of Fire," a bio of Lucy Ball.
and i pick you!
1. Elaborate on your avatar. would if i could, but i still cannot figure out how to add one. guess i need brains. and patience.
2.What's your current relationship status? oh so married. and oh so loving it.
3. Ever have a near-death experience? oh yeah. my mom & i were broadsided by a drunk when i was 20. not a good scene.
4. What is the name of the song that's stuck in your head right now? the theme for Good Eats. only because the show just came on. hey - it's better than "it's a small world".
5. Name a celebrity you would marry? the only one i think i could live with, without killing because of his seemingly lack of ego: George Clooney. he just seems like a real grown up. and the fact that he's adorable, even with gray hair, doesn't hurt much either.
6. Who will cut and paste this meme first? hmmmm...Linda? Allison?
7. Has anyone ever said you look like a celebrity? Benji? no. seriously, the only time is when the mail guy @ work said i looked like the girl from Gilmore Girls. i was totally flattered...until i realized he meant the chubby one. not that she's not cute, but, well...you know.
8. Do you wear a watch? What kind? i go back and forth. right now, no. but next week, who knows?!
9. Do you have anything pierced? oh yeah. two holes in each ear (but the top two i have let close up and the baby nose. you shoulda seen what i made the stud in my nose do today.
10. Do you have any tattoos? as much as i would like to, because it would totally go with my hippy persona, i gotta say no. i'm a big chicken. and if i change my mind, i'm stuck.
11. Do you like pain? oh no. and even if i did, you think i'd admit it here? sheesh. but no.not a chance.
12. Do you like to shop? oh yeah...groceries, scrapbook supplies, books, records...
13. The last thing you paid for with cash? my lunch.
14. The last thing you paid for with credit card? my last trip to Reno. i'm due for a fix. for Reno, that is, not a credit card binge.
15. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? the Husband - he was on his way home and looking for some meatballs in his spaghetti. grrr..
16. What is on your desktop background? an ocean scene...sigh. albino girl would love to be at the beach right about now...with SPF 5000.
17. What was the last movie you watched? Dreamgirls. i swear, i've worn a hole in the middle of the DVD.
18. What was the last book you read? Paula Deen's autobiography. right now i'm working on "Son of a Witch," by the same man who wrote "Wicked." but it's a dark, hard read. i gotta augment it with "Ball of Fire," a bio of Lucy Ball.
and i pick you!
Apr 27, 2007
i'll take potpourri for $500, Alex.
watch out: i'm gonna be all over the road without signaling.
just like a good Californian driver would.
on the way to get my tire fixed (i got a flat a week or so ago)i passed a church with this on it's signage: Count Your Blessings Instead of Your Problems.
accurate. but if it were only that easy.
i think because our problems consume us that there's not the same time made to look at our blessings.
face it: are not most of the commercials & talk shows out there focused on solving our problems? honestly, where would Oprah & Dr. Phil be if we did focus on the blessings?
besides out of a job, that is.
it goes along with the Great Social Experiment: no complaining. hard to do, because we're so conditioned the other way.
(lane change)
i met Jerry today at the tire shop. Jerry said hi to me, told me his name, and that he had to go to the bathroom.
Jerry was probably my age physically, and the age of my nephew mentally.
and today, the biggest problem Jerry faced was getting the Coke machine to take his dollar.
Jerry was happy. he had a big ol' smile, some funky suspenders and a bounce to his step that didn't care that he would never progress past the age of 7.
it's all about perspective, kids. and i need to change mine.
(lane change)
oh happy day! i finally got Donny's new cd today - Love Songs of the 70's.
sorry, though...i'm not sure how Will It Go Round In Circles became a love song? oh well.
i guess when i make a record i can afford to nitpick. until then...
oh happy day part two!! Dreamgirls finally comes out on DVD this Tuesday. i'm sure the Husband is shaking his fist at the Powers that Be for this one, and all i can say is get over it.
oh, and Sweetie? damn good thing you put the DVD player in our room with my new TV.
you'll enjoy laying on the bed watching "The Dirty Dozen," whilst i, luxuriate in the recliner with a refreshing beverage and several Kleenex's, watching my girl, Jennifer, rip out her and my heart.
you'll love it in there, baby.
(taking freeway offramp...dang! wrong street. back on freeway)
what have we learned today? probably not much.
i however am looking to change my attitude, regardless of what's going on real or imagined in my life.
Donny rocks.
ditto Dreamgirls dvd.
and it's Friday. 'nuff said, there.
happy Friday everyone!
just like a good Californian driver would.
on the way to get my tire fixed (i got a flat a week or so ago)i passed a church with this on it's signage: Count Your Blessings Instead of Your Problems.
accurate. but if it were only that easy.
i think because our problems consume us that there's not the same time made to look at our blessings.
face it: are not most of the commercials & talk shows out there focused on solving our problems? honestly, where would Oprah & Dr. Phil be if we did focus on the blessings?
besides out of a job, that is.
it goes along with the Great Social Experiment: no complaining. hard to do, because we're so conditioned the other way.
(lane change)
i met Jerry today at the tire shop. Jerry said hi to me, told me his name, and that he had to go to the bathroom.
Jerry was probably my age physically, and the age of my nephew mentally.
and today, the biggest problem Jerry faced was getting the Coke machine to take his dollar.
Jerry was happy. he had a big ol' smile, some funky suspenders and a bounce to his step that didn't care that he would never progress past the age of 7.
it's all about perspective, kids. and i need to change mine.
(lane change)
oh happy day! i finally got Donny's new cd today - Love Songs of the 70's.
sorry, though...i'm not sure how Will It Go Round In Circles became a love song? oh well.
i guess when i make a record i can afford to nitpick. until then...
oh happy day part two!! Dreamgirls finally comes out on DVD this Tuesday. i'm sure the Husband is shaking his fist at the Powers that Be for this one, and all i can say is get over it.
oh, and Sweetie? damn good thing you put the DVD player in our room with my new TV.
you'll enjoy laying on the bed watching "The Dirty Dozen," whilst i, luxuriate in the recliner with a refreshing beverage and several Kleenex's, watching my girl, Jennifer, rip out her and my heart.
you'll love it in there, baby.
(taking freeway offramp...dang! wrong street. back on freeway)
what have we learned today? probably not much.
i however am looking to change my attitude, regardless of what's going on real or imagined in my life.
Donny rocks.
ditto Dreamgirls dvd.
and it's Friday. 'nuff said, there.
happy Friday everyone!
Apr 5, 2007
i know what's good for America.
and i'm not even running for office.
wrap your mind around these little tidbits, if you will. and if elected, i promise a chicken in every pot. or a politician in every pot. i forget which is better.
wrap your mind around these little tidbits, if you will. and if elected, i promise a chicken in every pot. or a politician in every pot. i forget which is better.
- American Idol: perhaps you need to rethink your voting policies? come on, when a guy who's super cute (Sanjay, i'm talkin' to you) but his voice isn't that strong keeps getting on week after week? come on.
- limit anyone running for office to only being able to raise $1000 limit for their campaign. OR....if they have to earn as much as they do, then make them match dollar for dollar donations to people out there actually doing good. or better: create a national health care system for everyone who has none.
- Dancing with the Stars: come on. are ratings sooo low that you hire Heather Mills notMcCartney just so everyone will tune in to see if her leg flies off? look, i've got a great idea that not only will boost your ratings, BUT do something good for the America media: hire all the schmucks...er, gentlemen claiming to be Anna Nicole's baby's daddy. the winner gets the baby BUT has to donate all that money to the aforementioned national health care system. nuff said.
- attention all fashion magazines & designers of womens clothing: how 'bout making the standard sizes in all stores, from Nordstroms to Target go up to 18? since the average American woman wears a 14-18, wouldn't it make more sense? think of the millions of women you would make friends with, instead of alienate? not to mention open up the opportunities for shopping we would have.
oh yeah, and i'd also make more leg & bum room on airplanes, lower taxes, legalize something, more rights for women, blah, blah, blah.
vote valerie 2008.
Mar 22, 2007
my new theme song.
"Stand" by Rascal Flatts. if they had it to download to the blog, i would've.
You feel like a candle in a hurricane
Just like a picture with a broken frame
Alone and helpless - Like you've lost your fight
But you'll be alright- you'll be alright
Chorus:Cause when push comes to shove You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up Decide you've had enough
You get mad, you get strong, Wipe your hands, shake it off
Then you Stand
Then you stand
Life's like a novel - With the end ripped out
The edge of a canyon - With only one way down
Take what you're given before its gone
Start holding on, keep holding on
Repeat Chorus
Everytime you get up - And get back in the race
One more small piece of you Starts to fall into place
Chorus:Cause when push comes to shove You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up - Decide you've had enough
You get mad, you get strong, Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you Stand
here's to all of us standing.
You feel like a candle in a hurricane
Just like a picture with a broken frame
Alone and helpless - Like you've lost your fight
But you'll be alright- you'll be alright
Chorus:Cause when push comes to shove You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up Decide you've had enough
You get mad, you get strong, Wipe your hands, shake it off
Then you Stand
Then you stand
Life's like a novel - With the end ripped out
The edge of a canyon - With only one way down
Take what you're given before its gone
Start holding on, keep holding on
Repeat Chorus
Everytime you get up - And get back in the race
One more small piece of you Starts to fall into place
Chorus:Cause when push comes to shove You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up - Decide you've had enough
You get mad, you get strong, Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you Stand
here's to all of us standing.
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