the good, the bad and the ball.

what a week.

it's been up...down...at one point i was ready to check myself into the hospital...either a mental

one or a medical one. i'd take it all - as long as there's drugs.

so you know - earlier this year the Husband lost his job AND his car...although not at the same time. about a month into his unemployment hell, he got backed into in a parking lot, and the insurance company decided to total the truck out.

we've been borrowing a car from Kristie ever since.

last weekend we went on an insane car shopping death march. Mr. Particular knew what he wanted: light exterior. dark interior. leather. sunroof. 2005-2006.

oh and he didn't want to pay over $16,000. heck - that's like trying to find a virgin in Hollywood.

however...miracles do happen.

we are now the proud owners of this:

that would be a 2005 Solara, silver, leather interior with a moon roof. at the right price even. whodathunkit.

so Wednsday we picked it up - tomorrow we drive to the credit union to get the check to pay off the dealer.

then came Thursday.

you know how you get that karma? the bad vibe feeling. the no-good-horrible-very-bad-day feeling?

oh yeah. i had that.

first - i planned a birthday potluck for someone in my group for today; then i remembered we had another birthday this month and prepared to combine the two, when the boss said to make it for a day later this month. when i looked at him quizzically, he only said 'trust me - you don't want to have it tomorrow.'

good gravy, i thought. the layoff is Friday.

begin popping Maalox.

then about an hour later, the boss asks me when i take lunch. 12:30 i say. can you go earlier? he asks? just make sure you're back before 1pm.

holy freaking CRAP. the layoff is TODAY.

begin popping Pepto Bismol tabs and run to the...well - you know.

we go to lunch - and as we start to head back up, one of my lunch buddies, who also used to be my boss, says, 'oh, ladies, why don't you come with me.'

and we start walking over to a downstairs conference room.

i have no idea how i got there. my friend said i kept going red, then deathly white (which is a normal look for me), back to red. she just looked like she was going to cry.

we sat there for about 15 minutes or more before a few more people came in. i seriously forgot to breathe once.

then more people came in, and it finally got through to my hysterically panicked brain that i'm gonna be OK. i may die, but not today.

we lost nine people yesterday. thankfully, none of my close friends, but still.

so today, i had that feeling you must get when you survive something horrible. exhausted, yet exhilarated. bulletproof. giddy. then we had a meeting to discuss what's going to happen next week - we're all moving around. again. then we'll have one of our yearly re-orgs, where we divvy up everyone to make it more even coverage for the supervisors.

i'm leaving my current boss and going to a new group...with a supervisor i've had before. which is OK in some ways; i was starting to like him more, he was relaxing and not being so much of a schmuck. but on the other hand, my soon-to-be boss is laid back. VERY laid back. to the point where i want to shake him to possibly get a reaction.

but if i've learned nothing in my 20+ years at this place, it's this: nothing is forever. change is inevitable. keep packing boxes under your desk.

so there's the good and the bad. but what about the ball?

well, in Brendan's family when they were kids growing up, when one of them had a birthday, the other two each would get a ball - just to keep the peace.

so - it turns out that since Brendan got himself a car, he thought he would get me a ball.

here it is:

that would be a Canon Rebel XSi digital SLR.

oh good googly moogley.

the Husband said it's time for me to expand my horizons. he think i AM smart enough to figure out f-stops and exposures and all that crap. i differ with him on that one.

but we did bond on Tuesday (the camera and i, not the Husband. i bonded with him a long time ago) - i found a way to set the camera so i could basically erase things like fences, so when i took some pictures of horses at the racetrack by my work, even with a chain link fence standing between me and horse, i could make it go away.

of course, there is other gain for B besides the car - he now gets my old camera. and, after we get his old (my first) Canon fixed, it's going to my mom.

always like to see the good work go on.

today starts the OC Fair. did i go?

hell no. i'm SO chicken. i don't think i can walk in that exhibit by myself, so tomorrow, on the way home from the car payoff, we'll go and do a run-through.

likely i'll break his hand from squeezing it.

so what have we learned from all this?

that life is a roller coaster. hang on - it's one hell of a ride.