hey! @$*&^%!!!!!

'round these here parts, we have a lot of papers. now, i don't mean my place, but in the O.C.
there's regular papers, naturally - and the freebees.

my husband has one he likes, the OC Weekly. naturally, it has a lot of restaurant ads, articles, and ads for medical marijuana, piercing/tattoo shops and *ahem* people looking for dates.

what i like, is a small column called 'hey! @$*&%!!!!' and it's where regular joes can bitch out someone - a friend, the clerk at the grocery store, your neighbor, whoever in your life has pissed you off and while you want them to know, you don't want to tell them.

hey - isn't that what a blog is for?

* to the woman behind me at the grocery store yesterday with your two kids, and your flower purchase: i realize the right thing to do would have been to ask you if you wanted to go in front of me, especially since i had several bags of groceries to purchase. but i was tired and i'd been waiting in line for a long time.

that, however, does not give your kids the right to practically dry hump me and the checkout stand.

your son, who i figured was about 10 or 11, is totally old enough to stand still and wait a few minutes in line. your son is definitely old enough to keep his eyes on his own paper, and to not watch me write my check and keep trying to look at my check.

and you did & said nothing.

thanks. thanks for being such an attentive parent.


* to the neighbors at our complex that are apparently Lakers fans: dude. i get it. it was a great game yesterday. here's the thing: the Lakers already have a coach. several, in fact. they don't need you to help coach.

they especially don't need you reliving every play, good and bad. loudly. and they really don't need the repeated use of a certain four letter word. seriously, dude - there are kids here. not to mention the fact that i'm starting to think you really ARE hard up.


* to the "nana" of my friend's niece: thank you for offering to throw your grandchild's birthday party. i appreciate the fact that you recognize the baby parents don't have a lot of money and you want to help.

i don't appreciate the fact that you're doing this half-assed. i get that money's tight - believe me i do. but come on: you say you're buying a pinata, but you won't buy anything to put in it?

you plan the party to start right around lunchtime, but say you're only providing cupcakes? no food? OK. no worries, but at least put that on your invitations.

so you made the invitations by hand? that's totally cool - i love hand-made stuff, and i get how long it takes to do. but i don't get how, when you found out how many people were on the list to invite, that you decided you were done making invitations...especially when all you had to do was go to Target or Walmart or wherever and just get a packet of 'em.

seriously - you either throw a party or you don't. you don't have to go all Beverly Hills on the party, but at least do the right thing for your grandchild. follow through.

one final thing: you don't have to do this alone, y'know. all you have to do is ask and we'd be more than happy to help. but instead, you whine about how you weren't involved in either the baby shower or the christening...but if i remember correctly, you couldn't be bothered with the christening because you had tickets to a race.

just remember: it's all about priorities.


* to the fine, wise, smart & beautiful judges at the OC Fair's photography competition: man - you should totally wear that color more often! it does so much for you and completely brings out your eyes.

speaking of eyes, which are beautiful, by the way, i'm glad you use them to fairly judge the photos you see in the course of the competition this year.

good on you, judges. good on you.

by the way - thanks even more for putting two of mine in the '09 fair.

and i'd really love to see a blue ribbon this year on one of mine.

no pressure, though.