every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.

my oldest niece graduated from high school last night.

and while she's not technically a blood relation - i like to think that friends are the family you pick and actually don't mind visiting.

graduation is always such a milestone in any life. when your child starts kindergarten - it's always so exciting - they're starting off on a grand adventure and God alone knows what awaits them on this adventure.

high school graduation is much the same. as we sat there last night, listening to what the valedictorians planned on doing with their lives (a degree in microbiology with a minor in genetic engineering? good grief - i barely could manage remedial math.), you can't help but wonder what each of these kids lives has in store.

and selfishly - i didn't give a rip about the rest of the 539 kids there. just a certain blond, blue-eyed wonder.

i've known her most of her life. we would all go to Disneyland together, where her mom had started a tradition of taking Christmas card photos in front of the massively gorgeous tree in Main St.

she was (and still is) amazingly beautiful. Brendan & i would push her down Main St. in her stroller, while people would be sitting on the curb, waiting for the parade to start, we would prompt her to wave to the crowds, blow kisses and yell 'see my movie!' to the assembled.

which she did. hey - when you're 3, you're very eager to please.
(and yes, occasionally someone would ask the name of the movie. there still might be some yahoo from Podunk looking for her movie at RedBox)

at 4, she joined up in soccer...where she distinguished herself by being far more interested in the grass daisies than the plays.

when we got married, i asked her mom to be my matron of honor, and her daughter to be my flower girl. her mom was concerned that the girl would do something to 'ruin' the ceremony. i say anything that happened would only be cute - it couldn't ruin a thing.

and while she was very concerned about my gloves that her mom was holding for me, the whole thing went off without a hitch...or any ruined moments.

she got through those gawd-awful pre-teen years relatively unscathed...well, except for the continual teasing of her uncle. she takes care of her younger brother and strives to include him in as many things as she can...even when he has irritated her to the point of no return.

and now she's leaving childhood for a new chapter. a new adventure. again, God alone knows what is in store for her as she travels down new and uncharted territory.

i for one, cannot wait for the next installment.

good luck, class of 2010.

(first off, thanks to all who emailed and left comments on my bringing in da funk. my intent was to call my doctor this week, but settling back in to a routine after Vegas proved more challenging than even i anticipated. next week is looking much better - and i'll let you know what comes of it. feeling the way i did scared the hell out of me...i'm a person usually in control of those emotions and buddy, feeling out of control was.not.pleasant. moving on...)

next week, one of my best friend's kids graduates from high school...roughly coughcoughchoke30yearscoughcough after her auntie did. and while she's readying for the next phase in her life, i'm currently working with some of my fellow alumni on our next reunion this summer.

and that, of course, makes me feel nostalgic. not only for the youthful optimism we all had back then, but for that youthful metabolism.

dammit.

but again, i digress.

back in the day, when i dreamed of fame (and Donny), i only thought of accolades. awards. making amazing strides in the world of literature...which is what i thought i was gonna do.
life, as always, had other plans.

(but now i have a blog. take that, life!)

looking back, as i'm doing this a.m., i think of niecey-poo...beginning the next Big Adventure, and, as i am wont to do, am imagining myself giving a commencement speech. THIS should keep 'em off drugs, eh?

here goes.

Good evening, and congratulations Class of 2010...you made it! (wait for whooooops to die down)
I realize as you sit there, wearing those stupid hats...seriously, who thought 'hey, let's design a hat that can also double as a coffee table' was a good idea...not to mention those robes, because nine times out of ten, you graduate on a hot June day. And while layers, normally, are good, they're not so good when you aren't sure if you're on the field graduating or in a sauna, sweating.

Sorry. Old people like me tend to ramble on.

Tonight, as you've been hearing for the last few weeks, if not months, while it is an ending, is also a beginning. You'll leave this place different than when you came in - you'll have graduated and will be moving on to the next big adventure...whether it be college, military or working. You may never again be faced with this many choices for your life. Drink it in.

As you do move forward in your life, you'll make choices. Here's some things to ponder about those choices:

1) You will make crappy decisions in your life. Guess what - that's just the way it goes. Like the song says, every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. Some of the choices you make will rock the world. Others, not so much. Just try to remember to learn from all and glean something out of the experience.
And while we're talking about bad decisions....

2) You will fail at something. What - this isn't the happy feel-good commencement address you were expecting? Wait....
You, you, you and even you waaaaaay in the back, will fail at something. Some will fail miserably while others will fail spectacularly. As the Husband will frequently say - 'you're gonna step on your dick'

Colorful, no?

Here's the good news: despite what the media in all forms will tell you - failure IS an option and is not always bad. After all, a chemist at DuPont failed in an experiment he was working on and ended up creating Teflon. Failure is good - learn from it and move on.

3) Love what you do. Some wag once said if you love what you do, you will never work a day in your life. Those people also have money up the wazoo. It's very likely you will have to work, and you ain't gonna love it. But find a passion. Find something that makes you happy and excited to get up in the morning. Photography, writing, gardening - whatever trips your trigger - if you find your passion and aren't lucky enough to make it your life's work, you can still be lucky enough to do it...and to share with others.

4) Happiness is not a birthright - it is a daily choice. If you ain't happy, guess what - it ain't your parents fault, not your siblings, your friends or even your dog's fault. That blame, my friends, lands squarely on your shoulders.

Every day we make choices, remember? You can choose happiness, too, even if your situation sucks. You don't have to be happy with the situation, just know that optimism goes a loooooong way in this world - you will live longer and not only that, you will be a thorn in the side of the nay-sayers who will lose their minds wondering what you're on because you're so damn happy all the time.

I'm not saying you should go around with a maniacal smile all the time, plucking daisies like some Ophelia, but choose your attitude daily. Choose to be optimistic. Choose to be proof positive that smiling people are up to something.

There you have it. Four little nuggets and only four because I'm somewhat OCD and I like things bookended. Go out there. Fail. Step on it...and in it. It's the only way you'll really learn, and besides, the adventure is so much more exciting living it than reading about it.

Good luck, and God bless.

happy place found.

all i can say is, thank GOD i'm not going crazy.

shut up, you.


OK, maybe a little crazy...but not the total full-blown breakdown i thought i was having the last few days.

someone, somewhere, slapped me in the back of the head (think Gibbs in NCIS) and made me think...'hey - maybe this is hormone related?'

and i'm thinking they're right. i did some research...isn't the world-wide-web-wonderful...and found a site that listed a lot of the symptoms/emotions i've been feeling the last few days.

and therefore, after we return from a little RnR in VivaLasVegas, i will be calling the doctor and seeing about some supplements or something that can even me out.

thank God. i feel like a huge weight was lifted from me. the world isn't as dark, there really is light behind those clouds, and the sun will come up...tomorrow, of course.

catch ya on the flip.

find a happy place.

if you've got your health, you've got everything.

well, i say the advertising genius who came up with that nugget didn't know squat.

OK, we all know i have an occasional tendency to drama. i occasionally overreact. but lately,...

i need a happy place. there's stuff on my plate that i wish there wasn't. the Husband's extended unemployment stint. layoffs at work that i've managed to survive.

and i know for every icky thing in my life, there's at least two things good. the good, nine times outta ten, outweigh the bad.

it's just lately that the bad has taken over the place and the good can't get back in charge. and the good wants to be in charge. badly.

hee hee. get it? badly? oh, never mind.

i'm just miserable and am miserable to be around, i'm sure. and while i'm usually the optimist and the 'sun'll come out tomorrow,' right now, i just can't see it.

things will get better. i just need to roll with it. and i will...as long as i can.

it's the moon, i swear.

one of the pleasures of growing...um...more mature...is that the things that made our lives hell as teenagers and young adults, doesn't bother us as much or at all.

the drawback is that some of the stuff DOES bother us much more than it did before.

people smacking you around for what they believed you said/did. then after the fact, go on as if nothing happened.

c'mon. seriously? did we not leave this crud back in jr. high/high school? nope? oh. sorry.

how stupid of me to assume people grow up.

another thing that bothers me more now (gentlemen, you might want to turn away for a bit) is...ahem...that time of the month.
i mean honestly, if the plumbing isn't working and doing me a damn bit of good in the baby department, does it really have to rebel and try to claw its way out through my belly?

(BTW, Uterus, if you're reading this, could you please take the belly and part of my arse with you? much obliged.)

i also notice i am FAR more susceptible to the waining of the moon. my mood can change on a dime and woe be unto you if you look at me cross eyed. even if you haven't done anything.
i will kill you and bury your sorry butt somewhere in the Nevada desert. maybe next to Jimmy Hoffa.

on the other hand, i still love daisies, bunnies, puppies, kittens, cute clothes and makeup.

irrational - thy name is Valerie. peace out.

aliens have abducted my brain!

i was probed!

no, wait - i was probed AND felt up.

no, wait - that might not be too bad.

i was abducted, however...by the fiend known as Facebook.

duuuude. it's totally addicting. not to mention the games i play, farming and such, that my friends laugh at me for doing.

what the heck - they're free for the most part (right Maureen?!) and beats me hanging out at the corner market with my hooligan friends.

oh, wait....i gave up my hooligan friends back in 79. oh well.

besides, when my best friend is HOUNDING me to start blogging again, well, i guess it's easier to do that than to get HER on FB. (hint - hint - hint? stop laughing, K)

and i'd love to entertain you with a long, loving list of what i've been doing since my last post but the sad fact is, nothing i've done has been particularly entertaining. or interesting.

so there you go.
i will try to be a better blogger kids, both here and on the picture gallery.

man. it's good to be free from the aliens. or not.

moving

come by and see my new digs....luckyshotphoto.blogspot.com

stop by, won't you? i've got lemonade and cookies ready and waiting.

scratched an itch.

photography is kinda like crack.

well, to me, anyway.

there are times where i feel like, if i don't take some pictures every.dang.day., i could likely implode.

{kaa-BOOM.}

ok, so i'm a little bit of a drama queen. but dang, it's hard sometimes to not have someone or something cool in my viewfinder.

that's why this, yesterday, was sooooo much fun.

this is the Birthday Girl. she turned one earlier this week and her BIG party was yesterday.

she was such the little princess. and those shoes...gaaaaaaah - kil-ling me. killing.

she knows what a camera does. and she likes it.
she was pretty dang cute, too.

so was she. but this one...

hambone. last October, she wouldn't give ANY camera the time of day.

now? 'hey! j'wanna take my pitchure?'

oh, if i must.

they had a butterfly pinata, and as soon as daddy finally kicked its butt, the carnage commenced.

oh, the humanity!

thank you, Pargas, for letting me share in your fun!

have you checked my calendar lately?

i've always wanted one of those electronic brains. you know what i mean, the kind that have a phone, camera, calendar, GPS, apps and a bartender.

are you listening AT&T? Sprint?? i could totally use one that maybe has a little spout so i could have a tequila shot when and if i need it.

i'm just saying.

but, since i don't have one of those electronic brains...or real gray matter, for that, i have to rely on paper and pen.

i love paper and pen. i love my calendar, especially when next week looks like this:

Monday: lab work.

Tuesday: spend 15 hours downloading my photo homework to the website and then find that i downloaded them too small. rats.

Wednesday: vacation.

Thursday: vacation.

Friday: vacation.

now i know what you're saying. you're saying, 'hey! valerie!! you JUST CAME BACK FROM VACATION!!!' and you'd be right. but we're heading up to Reno so that we can watch THIS girl

graduate from kindergarten.

(and yes, this is a 3 year old picture. i love it, because i remember that just after i took this, she looked at me with all the disgust a 3YO can muster and said 'you take too many pictures of me.' i replied with, 'if i give you a quarter, will you let me keep taking pictures?' needless to say, she immediately took me up on the offer.)

oh, and so we can also help this guy:

celebrate another birthday.

totally cool.

aaaaaaaaaaaand - while we celebrate the birthday and graduation, the Husband & i will be volunteering at his classes last week of school fun.

cannot wait.

what kind of volunteering, you ask? well, Thursday after graduation, we're off to fill a gajillion water balloons for the water balloon toss (a.k.a. The Fight of the Century. someone's gonna get wet. a LOT of someones are gonna get wet, and i'm gonna do my best to be part of that. some kids are goin' down, that's all i'm saying.)

Friday is the class BBQ. i volunteered the Husband to help man the fire and dawgs on them.

Saturday is the boy's birthday. besides the usual birthday whoopin' that he's gotta get, there will be dirt bike riding (go Dean McQueen!), trampoline jumping, swimming, Rover rides and heaven only knows what.

and i'll probably fill up a memory card on my camera. what a way to go.

cannot wait. can-not.

today, i'm off, with the Husband, to get some photo lovin' on. a 1st birthday party, thrown by a not very nice person for her granddaughter.

it's not that she doesn't love her granddaughter, she just, to me at least, is a very selfish person, who wants all the credit, but doesn't want to do any work. not only does she not want to do any work, she doesn't want anyone else to help, or participate, because then she wouldn't get any of the credit.

selfish? oh youbetcha. matter of fact, at the baby's christening, the not-very-nice person left right after church. because she had tickets for the Long Beach Grand Prix, and didn't want to miss it.

for the party today, she said she was getting a pinata for the party. but she wasn't buying any filling for it.

a class act all the way.

regardless, the birthday girl's auntie (a good friend of mine) and i will make sure it's a fun time today.

and i get to do what i love - have me some photo lovin'

ink me in for your next event, wontcha?

hey! @$*&^%!!!!!

'round these here parts, we have a lot of papers. now, i don't mean my place, but in the O.C.
there's regular papers, naturally - and the freebees.

my husband has one he likes, the OC Weekly. naturally, it has a lot of restaurant ads, articles, and ads for medical marijuana, piercing/tattoo shops and *ahem* people looking for dates.

what i like, is a small column called 'hey! @$*&%!!!!' and it's where regular joes can bitch out someone - a friend, the clerk at the grocery store, your neighbor, whoever in your life has pissed you off and while you want them to know, you don't want to tell them.

hey - isn't that what a blog is for?

* to the woman behind me at the grocery store yesterday with your two kids, and your flower purchase: i realize the right thing to do would have been to ask you if you wanted to go in front of me, especially since i had several bags of groceries to purchase. but i was tired and i'd been waiting in line for a long time.

that, however, does not give your kids the right to practically dry hump me and the checkout stand.

your son, who i figured was about 10 or 11, is totally old enough to stand still and wait a few minutes in line. your son is definitely old enough to keep his eyes on his own paper, and to not watch me write my check and keep trying to look at my check.

and you did & said nothing.

thanks. thanks for being such an attentive parent.


* to the neighbors at our complex that are apparently Lakers fans: dude. i get it. it was a great game yesterday. here's the thing: the Lakers already have a coach. several, in fact. they don't need you to help coach.

they especially don't need you reliving every play, good and bad. loudly. and they really don't need the repeated use of a certain four letter word. seriously, dude - there are kids here. not to mention the fact that i'm starting to think you really ARE hard up.


* to the "nana" of my friend's niece: thank you for offering to throw your grandchild's birthday party. i appreciate the fact that you recognize the baby parents don't have a lot of money and you want to help.

i don't appreciate the fact that you're doing this half-assed. i get that money's tight - believe me i do. but come on: you say you're buying a pinata, but you won't buy anything to put in it?

you plan the party to start right around lunchtime, but say you're only providing cupcakes? no food? OK. no worries, but at least put that on your invitations.

so you made the invitations by hand? that's totally cool - i love hand-made stuff, and i get how long it takes to do. but i don't get how, when you found out how many people were on the list to invite, that you decided you were done making invitations...especially when all you had to do was go to Target or Walmart or wherever and just get a packet of 'em.

seriously - you either throw a party or you don't. you don't have to go all Beverly Hills on the party, but at least do the right thing for your grandchild. follow through.

one final thing: you don't have to do this alone, y'know. all you have to do is ask and we'd be more than happy to help. but instead, you whine about how you weren't involved in either the baby shower or the christening...but if i remember correctly, you couldn't be bothered with the christening because you had tickets to a race.

just remember: it's all about priorities.


* to the fine, wise, smart & beautiful judges at the OC Fair's photography competition: man - you should totally wear that color more often! it does so much for you and completely brings out your eyes.

speaking of eyes, which are beautiful, by the way, i'm glad you use them to fairly judge the photos you see in the course of the competition this year.

good on you, judges. good on you.

by the way - thanks even more for putting two of mine in the '09 fair.

and i'd really love to see a blue ribbon this year on one of mine.

no pressure, though.