the first day of the rest of my life. again.

yesterday was my birthday. another year older.
i am 47 years old.

lemme say it again, in case you missed it. f-o-r-t-y-s-e-v-e-n.

gaaaah.

again, if i had known i was gonna live this long, i'd taken better care of myself.
but i didn't, so i might as well start now right?? right???

oh well.

47.

i realize it's not that old in the scheme of things and most days, i don't feel that old. some days, however, i feel much, MUCH older.

like now.

you see, not only did i have a birthday yesterday, i had the distinct honor of being sick -on.my.birthday.

actually, all week. the Husband has had typhoid/yellow fever/creeping crud for almost a week, and i was feeling pretty dang proud of myself that i had avoided it. that was until Wednesday morning came and i was calling the police, trying to report a hit & run on my bum.

and i proceeded to sleep the majority of the time. Wednesday, Thursday and yesterday. well, scratch that...not last night so much.

like a dumbass, i over medicated myself with cough medicine and Mucenix and could NOT get to sleep until about 2:30 this morning...whereupon i immediately woke up at 6:30 with the cheerful May Gray streaming in my face.

stupid sun. there ought to be a law.

and there ought to be a law against being sick on your birthday.

it s-u-u-u-u-u-cks.

did it effect my appetite? unfortunately not, except for the fact that the Husband's tummy did not like him, so therefore i had no appetite.

oh well. soup and grilled cheese is still good.

47. three years away from 50. eight years away from AARP membership.

and i'm still standing. over medicated, but standing.

memorial day.

salute the standing.
remember the fallen.
and remember it's not all about bbqs, the beach and beer.

on the savannah.

yesterday, i had the opportunity to be a wildlife photographer. photographing birds and wild cats.

in the wilds of Long Beach, at my mother's, who is the Crazy Cat Lady of the neighborhood and somehow got two rather feral cats from the same litter, who got themselves pregnant at about the same time.

did i mention they're both sisters from the same litter? and pregnant at the same time??

good grief.

now, my mom & step-pop has three cats they would claim as their own, and about four others they say aren't, but i say when you feed 'em, then you've got 'em.

and that makes them ripe photo ops for me.

apparently, momma no like her picture being taken.

i think she's praying for the milk bar to close soon.

here's her four. there's another three, a little bigger, but smarter. they won't get near me. this gray one in front is especially sassy, and hisses a tiny hiss like there's no tomorrow. not being easily intimidated, i just laugh, pick 'er up and hold next to my heart. immediately they calm down and almost purr.

almost.

and they play a lot of tag.

then there was this birdie.

not sure what kind this was, helping itself to the free buffet at the birdfeeder, but it was pretty. if you know, will you tell me? (i say a robin, but apparently we don't get robins in Mostly Smoggy Southern California.)

i don't know what it is, but it is pretty.

now all i have to do is wait for National Geographic to call.

the happiest place on earth.

so after the last post, i believe it's time for something a little happier. don't you?

so here it goes.

after Vegas with Kristie & her family, my sister-in-law, her husband and the Cutest Kids in Reno, came down for a visit. my brother in law had training classes all week, and since they were close, hey! let's go to Disneyland all week.

thus began what i called the DDM. Disneyland Death March.

and who better to go on a march with than people i love? and did i mention i love taking pictures? and did i also mention i love taking pictures of way super-cute kids at Disneyland?

just as good as seeing Donny & Marie.

oh yeah. just.as.good.

the Cutest Kids in Reno with the Cutest Mom in Reno. and the Cutest Husband in Buena Park. (you KNOW i HAD to put that one in)

i always heard about the Golden Hour: an hour before sunrise, the hour after sunset, where the sun casts a golden glow around. but i had never experienced it in any photos i ever took. i'm a believer now.
the Girl was quite excited about meeting the Mouse. the Boy, however, at 8 3/4, is a little too grown up to get his picture taken with them.

i'm cool with that.

they went on every ride we could. the scary ones? not a problem - well...except for the Tower of Terror and the roller coaster California Screamin'. the Girl 'did NOT like that ride.'

and proceeded to tell everyone she met about them. however, she LOVED Space Mountain.

and again, proceeded to tell everyone she met.

this is what it looks like when Auntie buys you a Slurpee.
oh yeah. this does my heart good, seeing the young'un taking pictures. even if it is pictures of funny signs & trash cans.

i love photo rich environments.

and photo rich targets, too.

thanks Maureen, for letting me share in your kids', and your life.

times a-wasting.

*WARNING: the following post could cause crying, tightening of the chest and uncontrollable urges to go hug like there's no tomorrow your kids, your significant other and, quite possibly, your dog. or cat. i'm easy.*

the letter started out easily enough.

"dear mom & dad, every 15 minutes, someone dies as a result of an alcohol-related accident."

then it turned. badly.

"today, i died."

the letter is a part of this program. a woman i work with has two boys in high school and one of them was 'chosen' to be killed in a crash and had to write this letter.

the program selects some kids to be 'killed'. some were driving the car drunk that killed their friends. the 'killed' ones wore black all day and could not speak to any of their friends during the day.

then, right before lunch (ed. note: never EVER plan any gut-wrenching assembly right before lunch. it's just wrong.), the school had an assembly where they read obituaries on each of the 'dead' kids.

and the moms cried.

hell, i cried, just thinking about the pain that parents DO feel when their kids, their friends, their loved ones are killed as a result of drunk/buzzed/no-really-i'm-OK-to-drive driving.

every 15 minutes.

i'm lucky. no one i knew or cared about was ever hurt or killed in a drunk driving accident, or as a result of one. well...wait. that's not exactly true.

my mom & i were.

i had turned 20, we were on our way home, less than 1/2 a mile from our home in fact, and making a left turn on to our street.

the only thing i remember is my mom saying 'oh shiiii...' the next thing we were spinning like a completely psycho Tea Cup from Disneyland.

when i realized what had happened, there was a huge face at my window, banging on the glass, asking me if i was OK.

and all i could think was 'lady, i'd be a lot better if you'd stop yelling and banging. you're making my headache worse.'

we were lucky. no. blessed. the Hand of God was truly on us that day, because the idiot that hit us was doing at least 60MPH coming down the hill as he hit us. he t-boned us just past the right passenger door.

a few inches more and my mom might not have been here. the cops said that i definitely would not be here, because the force of the impact would have probably flung me out of the car.

oh, and did i mention we didn't wear seatbelts? didn't have to then. we did after that.

nothing serious in the way of after-effects. broken nose (me), bruised ribs (both), a huge dent in my mother's leg where she was jammed into the steering wheel.

who cares about a dent or bruising. we're both still alive.

so, while the idea of 'every 15 minutes' seems shocking at first, and the realization of every parents nightmare, i agree with their philosophy: if it saves just one life, it was so worth it.

go now. hug someone (or several someones) you love. because today is short and tomorrow's never EVER a guarantee.

and you never know what the next 15 minutes may bring.

Vegas, Baby.

the Friday before Mother's Day, the Husband & i joined my best friend, her kids & mom for a trip to Vegas.

Vegas. the hot bed of heat, buffets, shows and the Loosest Slots on the Strip!!

well at least that's what most of the casinos say. i can't figure out how every casino can be sooo huge and still have the most money give-aways.

we stayed at the same place we did last year - South Point, which, ironically, is at the south point of the Strip on Las Vegas Blvd.

for Friday night and most of Saturday, it was a girls' trip. Brendan stayed behind with Kristie's son for a Scouting event on Saturday. and the girls made the most of it.

and, where Vegas is, shows will be also. there's a lot of them out there and it seems like dang near every casino has a Cirque du Soleil show.

but the Tropicana has this.

(and it's really fun for me to bounce up & down in the car every time we passed the Trop, especially with the HUGE banner on the side of the building with their faces on it. )

and i went.

*giggle*

in our hotel, there was a mini travel agency that also sold half price Vegas tickets. the problem was trying to decide what show we should see that we could without making the boys upset that they missed that show.

and believe me, missing Donny & Marie would not bother the Husband one bit.

so while Kristie and her mom went to see this, the 16 YO said, sure, i'll go with you to see Donny & Marie.

wait...what?

so off we went.

so what if we had balcony seats? well, i ended up caring when Donny started walking across the tables at the stage level.

dagnabbit.

it was a killer show. they danced - seriously danced with lots of sweat. there was lots of their typical bro/sis ribbing and yes, the 16YO really loved the show...so much so that yes, she wants to borrow auntie's cd/dvds...much to her mother's chagrin.

at one point, Donny made a rather sexified move and she whooped, at which point i felt it necessary to remind her that she just whooped at a 51 YO grampa.
yep. THAT freaked her out.

i love him.

i really, really love him. Brendan knows. he's used to it.

so while Brendan & i won no money, Kristie's mom did. she ended up coming home with some nice change, courtesy of video poker.

dang - i need to get better at that.

i might be able to get better seats next time i go to Donny & Marie.

alive. well. not living in Peru.

in the beginning - there was a blog. and it was updated regularly.

and it was good.

then cameth writers block and it verily sucketh.

then cameth a trip to Vegas, tickets to see Donny and Marie and a visit from my sister in law with her two kids. and a death march for three days across Disneyland.

and it was good, too. yea, verily.

but behold - i am still aliveth and will posteth more on the morrow.

and pictures shall follow.

something's missing.

besides me, that is.

*sigh* i don't know what the deal is. normally, writing for me is right up there with, oh, let's say eating hot bread with lotsa butter.

lately though - not so much.

i'm not sure what's going on with me. but, because i'm fairly sure no one wants to read a diatribe on a pity party that i'm throwing...please byob, by the way...here's the run-down on what's been going on.

you can skip to the end if you want.

• did you know i have a bad attitude? apparently complaining to someone about someone else breaking rules was the wrong thing to do. i'd say more on that later, but who knows who reads this.

• now i'm paranoid. great.

• step-pop healing nicely from the surgery. apparently so much so that he's back to driving my mom to the edge of sanity...which, really is where most of my family is on a day-to-day basis.

• Cutest Kids in Reno, along with their parents come down for A WHOLE WEEK next month. and, in between filling up memory cards with their mugs, getting smothered (and smothering them) in grimy hugs & kisses, chasing the 6 year old (come BACK HERE NOW!!!) and what not, their mother and i will do the Disneyland Deathmarch. and remember at the end of each and every day why it is that the Lord gives children to the young.

• heading to Vegas the weekend of mother's day with the Cutest Kids in Hesperia AND their mother AND their grandmother. conspiring with the mother to go on a pub crawl throughout Vegas and make the teenager be the designated driver. that should make her 'just say no.'
  

• Husband still sort of unemployed. he's currently helping a man who owns a training school by handing out fliers at factories, warehouses and such, then helps him train the students. so at least there's a bit of mad money coming in, but the economy still sucks.

• up side (a small one) to being unemployed most of the year? we become the favorites of Uncle Sam and get a really, REALLY nice refund this year. even from the Great State of Cal-ee-forn-eye-aye, which hasn't happened in years. i always end up paying them.

• working a lot of overtime lately - and while the money's nice, i can tell i'm getting old. i don't bounce back from it like i used to. getting old is wrong.

• since i AM working overtime, i decided to splurge and give myself a present - i signed up for this. what really sold me: i have to turn in photos and have them critiqued. niiiice.

• friday @ work, i got a plaque celebrating my 20 years of service with the Company, which is great, except that i've been there 22 years. oh well, better late than never.

and that, Gentle Reader, is why i call this Random Thoughts.

cropping for fun and profit! -or- how you too can learn to stop worrying and enjoy the process.

that has GOT to be the longest blog title i've ever written.

but i digress. and look! a new record for my attention span; i've digressed in the first sentence.
gooooooooooooooooooooooo me!

anyway -
it occurred to me today how cropping a photo can make it go from 'eh', to 'eeeeee gods! what photographic genius took this miraculous snippit of nature?!'

and i do realize that this isn't new to anyone else. nor will it cure the world's ills and set Wall Street back on its merry little cash-making way, but it was just one of those things that the more i thought of it, the more i realized what a difference it can make.

let me demonstrate.

here's our cat. Elvis the Evil Wunderkat. a blah photo. an eeeee-vil gleam in his eyes. but! through the wonders of cropping....

now you can see how evilly his eyes gleam. and how i SO needed to pick up the extension cord from the floor.

let's try another example, shall we? roadside daisies before...and - through the miracle of the crop tool...why look! a bouquet of daisies fit enough to grace a table.

just one more to bore you with. but it never ceases to amaze me how a photo, like this of my niece, while still good....can, with a little time and care, be transformed into something that just takes my breath away.

and hopefully, that of the judges in this year's OC Fair.

yes - with just a little care and experimentation, kids, you too can take photos to another level. amaze your friends! confound your enemies!

just don't expect it to work miracles for things like this:

after all, i am NOT a miracle worker.

is there such a thing as decision makers anonymous?

i need help.
other than the normal.

i am completely incapable of making a decision.

now don't get me wrong, some things i still have capacity in decision making.
go to the bathroom? it's a go. (pun intended)
eat when i'm hungry? good to go. (however, what to eat is still a matter for debate)
go to work? a go, although when i win the Big Jackpot, it will quickly become a no-go.
update the blog regularly?

well....

although, when it comes to picking three photos for possible entry in the local fair, well - i choke up tighter than a politician who was asked if he (or she) ever inhaled.

just for the record, my fellow Americans: no, i have never.

but pick three photos? gaaaaah. it becomes Sophie's Choice - the Remake. only substitute me for Meryl, Brendan for Kevin and the dang photos for my babies.

because that's what they become to me, you know. they become my children. and heaven knows i can't pick one over the other - that would be wrong. the others would have hurt feelings. they might plot together when i'm not in the room and decide to gang up on me in the middle of the night and....

ooops. sorry. that's what i used to think about my toys when i was a kid. really, now i only have a slight twitch from those electro-shock treatments.

seriously - it's the hardest thing ever. of course, some i love more than others, but what kills me is trying to balance what i have/do against what i saw at the fair last year AND to hold them up against what i remembered won.

which is impossible. remember: i have goldfish memory.

so let's see: i have goldfish memory AND i cannot make a decision.

shoot me. but make sure you get my good side.

last year at the fair, i just remember pictures were HUGE. the Fair want them at a minimum framed size of 8x10, going up to 32x32. i had printed my ladybug from last year at 5x7 and remember thinking, d-a-a-a-a-ang. this is BIG.

then i got to the fair and thought, d-a-a-a-a-ang. i've got a postcard up there.

now here's one of my many problems. i am Queen of the Control Freaks. i (possibly) can pick three photos. i can submit them. IF one or (heaven help me) all three are chosen, then i've got to have them framed. black frame, white mat, Plexiglas preferred. all within the span of about 3 weeks before i have to take them down to the fairgrounds for judging. which also happens about the same time as graduation here and last year i dealt with the local frame shops up to their necks in jobs before graduation.

once again, early planning seems to be the key. a plus for us control freakos.

that's all based on any of them being chosen. last year, i was one of 300 chosen out of a field of 3000 submitted. i'm not telling you this to pat myself on the back...

well, OK. maybe i am.

BUT! my point is this: there's a LOT of peeps in the OC that love photography as much as i do. some more, i'm sure. and there are a WHOLE LOT more of 'em that are a WHOLE LOT better than me. and to say i've got as good a chance as any of the others is, well...wrong.

better ones are going to win. some of the time. Brendan thinks the only reason i didn't win last year was because my ladybug wasn't big enough.

remember kids: size DOES matter. bigger IS better.

then, of course, there's this: let's say i go ahead and print my three submissions super large. get 'em framed and ready to go. then, let's say from my three, the Fair only picks one, or maybe all. then what do i do with these three huge framed pictures after the fair is over?!

i live in an apartment. we do not have a wing for the art we've collected. and as much as i love my niece, i do not want her sweet baby blue eyes gazing down at me from the ceiling while her auntie saws logs.

or anything else.

so you see - that's the vicious circle i spin myself into. i worry about them getting chosen, and i worry if they don't...and what to do with the products after the fact. i.need.help.

wait - i've got it. i can sell 'em on eBay!

or maybe i should try Etsy.

crap. another decision. i am sooooo screwed.